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Boyfriend LYING
Okay,
My boyfriend has been looking at p*rn a lot lately and it really bothers me. It bothers me because that is what he seems to prefer rather than us having sex together. He doesn't tell me he is looking at it, He hides it. Whenever I question or ask about it he lies...and it is really starting to tick me off.
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I think you have a right to feel bothered by it. To me, looking is the first step of cheating. The people in the porn videos are just as real as the people walking down the street. I agree with you that it is wrong for him to continue this behavior when he knows you don't like it. If he really cares about you, he will respect your feelings. One can argue if you really care about him you'll let him watch something he enjoys watching. However, since you said "lately", this implies he has recently started this while dating you. Lying is not helping him either. Honesty and trust are key components to a healthy and successful relationship. You said he seems to prefer watching porn than having sex with you. This is not a good sign. This could mean he is doing more than just watching porn. Or it could mean he is losing interest in you. You need to confront him about your feelings and the fact that you know he has been lying. Tell him you would appreciate if he would be honest with you. Let him know you care about him and want to work things out. If he continues to lie or is not willing to compromise with you, than I say he is too immature for a relationship and that you deserve better. Good luck. Hope I helped. If you need anything else I'm here!
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The fact is, most guys watch porn. Even if a guy is perfectly happy in the relationship, and they have sex with their girlfriends. They love that, but you have to know that just because he watches porn that he's not interested in you or he doesn't enjoy it. Guys enjoy it, and they are more sexual than girls are. They watch it because it's entertaining to watch other people having sex, that's all. He's still attracted to you, but porn is porn. It can be his way of a fantasy. Most couples actually watch porn together and it can bond them in a way, try new positions, etc. If it bothers you that much, talk to him and tell him to explain to you why he watches it.. he'll probably give you the same answer. Entertainment. It's nothing that you are doing wrong, it's just something that guys enjoy watching.
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First off, we all know you can't get men off their porn. That's a fact.
Accept that whatever you're going to do, he's going to go to his stash of porn anyway.
Then you'll have to ask yourself, why is he hiding it? Is it because you're so het up about him having them? Or that you hate him having them? If you loosen up in those areas, you two could probably share the joy of looking through them.
If it was me though, I'd be mischevious about it. And deprive him of sex for while, see how he likes it. He'll probably realise that having sex with You is a lot better than looking at porn.
Hope I help! ^^
Rachel 16/F/Aus
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