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I thought she loved me, she left me
Im almost 19 years old. I started going out with my highschool sweetheart 2 and a half years ago. She left me a few days ago, saying that she needed a break from everything. Ive asked if this is forever, or if she ever wants to get back with me and she says she doesnt know.
Weve been saying how we wanted to get married once I was done with college. We both moved to a new town 2 hours away from our hometown about 4 months ago, I moved there because she wanted to move there. Neither of us have any friends here. I dropped out of college here (I plan on going somewhere else) and I havent gotten a job yet. She has a job. She is literally the only thing I have in this town, and my lease isnt up for another 8 months. We both want to move back to our hometown.
Anyways, she left me! She broke up with me 6 times in the past 2 months, she took me back right away except for the last time. She also just started hanging out with an old friend (a guy). She is not attracted to him at all, she says she only hung out with him to make me upset, and she doesnt want to hang out with him again. Why would she want to make me more upset if shes the one who left me? She says she still loves and cares about me, and wants to stay my best friend. But she wants zero contact for awhile.
The night after she hung out with this guy for the first time, she called me and told me what happened and was crying and said she regretted it. She asked me to pick her up (it was 1am) She said that she just wanted a break from me, but for sure wanted to get back with me someday. She then started kissing me and we talked all night, and she slept in my arms. I took her home in the morning. After that, she said that night only happened how it did because she was upset and tired. Also, when she broke up with me a few times ago, when she was taking me back and crying, she told me to never give up on her, that shes just really emotional because she hates living in this town and her job and everything.
Last night we saw each other, and we ignored the fact we broke up. We were talking and laughing, and we even held hands (we were driving back to our hometown). I felt alot better, but when we went back home, and I asked her how she felt about me, she said she still doesnt know and needs to take a break, and doesnt know if shell ever want me back. So now, were trying not to talk or see each other at all. Im so confused, and I dont know what to do! Also, im stuck in this town with no one and nothing! Shes all I had here. Any help, on anything? Thanks
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Wow. Boy do I know how you feel. My wife and I moved back to a shit small town to be close to her family and this place is choking the both of us. We've had our fair share of fights, too.
Honestly, what this sounds like is that she is just so stressed out and screwed up by life events that she doesn't know which way is up. She can't control anything except the relationship, so she's controlling the relationship by breaking up.
You need to sit her down and talk to her. Inform her of a few things.
- You aren't going anywhere
- You know she doesn't want to go anywhere
- You're in this together, and you need to stick together
- You don't understand whats going on inside her head, what she's thinking about life, relationship, etc. And you want to.
Get her to talk. Ask questions. Try to get inside her head a little and offer her a fresh perspective. It sounds like she's torn up about something or several somethings and if you help her vent a little pressure that might smooth things out a bit for the two of you.
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It sounds like she's confused about what she truely wants seeing as what she tells you keeps changing one minute she wants a break from you and the next she's calling you up and crying telling you she regretted it if she truely regretted it she'd try and make things better instead of telling you she needs a break i think once your lease is fully up you should move back to your hometown and go to college there she needs to make up her mind and decide whether or not she wants to be with you or not you've got your own life to live and you can't be waiting around for her to make up her mind while your still in that town you could try searching for a job it seems like she's the one who's giving up on you your the one who's trying to keep the two of you together her saying that she doesn't know if she'll ever want you back again sounds like she's unsure and the two of you won't get back together again unless she changes her mind you should probably move on because you can't be wondering if something is going to happen that might not
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She may wanting a break because you aren't working you aren't in school any more. My husband doesnt work and doesnt really look and it drives me crazy. I wish hed try and get a job.
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