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my father needs to move out!
my father moved in 5 months ago, it was only supposed to be for 2 months...and I convinced my husband to let him stay here for the 2 months. Now he is watching my husbands tv eating our food and being way to comfortable in our house! and I feel bad because my husband wants to watch tv but wont change the channel if my dad is already watching it because he doesn't want to be rude. It is really starting to bug him...I can tell. my brother asked by dad to move in with him to help him out but by dad ignored the whole conversation, it seems like he doesn't want to leave!!! I want my normal life back but don't know how to tell him!!!
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A man's home is his castle, and your husband's castle has been invaded! You've done your part as a good daughter. You helped out your father when he needed it. Unfortunately he hasn't kept up his end of the bargain. Thats not your fault. You've overextended yourself, now the health of your marriage is on the line. You'll need your husband's support on this one. The two of you need to sit down with Dad and explain to him that he's stayed longer than you first agreed and its time for him to move one. Your brother is willing to put him up, so you're not kicking him out on the street. Then pick a date to move him out and hold to it! He may be hurt, he may say things that hurt you, but stand your ground. He's just venting, but in the long run he'll realize that it was best for everyone. Most of all, remember that you are NOT a bad person for doing this. You and your husband need your own space to relax and be yourselves. You've been quite generous, you have nothing to feel guilty about.
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Unfortunately, there isn't a really easy way to do what you have to do, which is to have a heart to heart with your father and tell him it is time to go to your brother's house. Tell him he needs to move out and to your brother's by the first of the month (and then stick to it). Call your brother and tell him your father will be moving in at the first of the month. Toward the end of this month, start packing your father's things up and then arrange for your brother to come over on the first day of the month and move him out...your brother would drive him to his house. Be matter of fact about it. Try not to get into specifics other than say, it's time for you to live with him. Try not to get into lengthy conversations as to why, etc. That really won't help. Good luck.
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