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I am bad at this
I am bad at relationships and I never know what I am doing wrong In relationships. I have never had a relationship last longer than 2 months. I am eighteen years old and all of my friends think that I am a "player" but I have no idea where they are comming from. I Do have alot of girls that like me, but I have a certain standard and only about 2% of the girls that have liked me meet those standards. Should I lower my standards?
Looks aren't on the top of my list, but like everyone else knows, it's a nice bonus. I am a baseball player and everyone that likes me is always hanging on other guys and I don't think that that is cool.
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You just might need to lower your standards. Not every girl who meets your standards is exactly a nice fit for you, and not every girl who doesn't meet them doesn't mean that you two wouldn't make it in a relationship. You need to keep you mind open about things.
Things like, 'never have done drugs' or 'doesn't smoke' are understandable because well....they're disgusting. But things like 'Must have a nice body' or 'Has to get along with my friends' are just a bit too excessive.
If you are on a bit of the jealous type of guys, then you might need to date a girl that you KNOW you can trust, or learn to trust a bit better.
Maybe you should look at some types of girls that you've never really looked at before. Like The Quiet Shy type girls, or the Strong Smart and Interesting.
Remember, keep your mind open. That's probably the best way to figure out what you really want out of a girl and a relationship
Good Luck
Atty/15
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If you can't articulate your standards in less then three sentences, you need to re-evaulate them.
If your standards include a lot of NEVERs or ALWAYs you might need to lighten up.
If you think being in a relationship means she's not allowed to ever be friendly to other guys, or if you think girls who like you must have never in the past, or in the future, ever liked any other guy you know, you need to get over that one in a big hurry.
Setting the standard of 'not using drugs' makes sense. Setting the standard of 'never used drugs even once' is a bit prohibative and you might miss out. Seting the standard 'must be nice' might make some sense, but setting the standard 'must never have flirted with one of my teammates' is just nit-picky and judgemental. Met a nice girl who flirted with someone you know last week? That's all cool if she likes you more. Met a nice girl with a long-term huggy friendship with a guy, don't worry about it. If she isn't with him, she probably doesn't want to be.
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