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jealous of friend of 11 years
i have a friend, let's call her her liz . liz is really good friends with my crush lets call him alex . alex acted like he didn't want to be around me after he found out i liked him. anyway today alex and liz seemed to get pretty chummy with one another. they were playing around with one another (not sexual) he would always go and sit by her. and he leaned on her arm while she was texting. he sat in her lap. and she gave him a back rub and kept her hand on his back when she was done. ( i wanted to tell her to take it off but that would be wrong). i think he layed on her too. it seems like they like each other. i couldnt stop looking. i didn't want to look but i couldnt help it. its like i feel really jealous but i really have no right to be i dont think liz knows i like alex though. i know this could be friends playing but i don't think it is. am i wrong to be jealous? what do i do to get over this jealousy? do i tell her how i feel even thought i don't see the point of it?
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I hate it when a "friend" is so disrespectful and thoughtless. How immature this woman is. Yes, he is probably more to blame because he is in the relationship with you, but I hate it when women hurt each other. There are so many men in the world and to approach yours...it's just not right. I would try not to let it appear to bother you but I would talk to her privately and ask her what she is thinking. Now I'm the type of person who doesn't put up with that too long...(see so many men from above). Your life is too short for stress, you have enough of that with the daily life, work, bills etc... Don't put up with it too long. That's not love anyway. Good luck hon.
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With that much physical contact, there's no doubt that Alex is into Liz.
Liz is probably into Alex. Physical contact is a pretty good indicator of sexual attraction between two people. More physical contact means more attraction. But women are more flexible about male-female relationships, so she may just be keeping him close because she likes the attention he gives her. Or to keep a "guy friend" (women like having guy friends). But whatever it is, Liz is getting something she wants from Alex. And she may be trying to develop that relationship.
I know it sucks, but if Alex is into Liz, you can't change that. He wants Liz more than he wants you.
The jealousy you feel is your competitiveness for Alex, which is perfectly natural. But Liz's jealousy and competitiveness will come out in response to yours if she senses you're threatening her relationship with Alex.
If she wants Alex as a real boyfriend, she's got the upper hand and won't be happy to give it up. You'll build some real resentment if you get in the way of that budding relationship that she's working to develop. And the best you can expect from Alex is that you become his second choice.
You have to accept that your feelings are your responsibility. Jealousy sucks, but don't make your feelings a problem for Liz or Alex.
Respect their choices. Just as you'd want if you and Liz switched places.
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