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Going Nuts.
So here's my situation. I started working at this sub shop back in June and I found out that one of the other employees was my brother's good friend. I'm 17, he's 20.
At first I thought he was...just not my type. I'm a straight-A student, graduated from high school 2 years early, pre-med, getting my AA degree next May, drank for the first time last June, hates drugs, etc. All that good stuff. Oh and I've never had a boyfriend or my first kiss. I'm not a prude and I'm not a loser--I just have met a lot of loser guys and I haven't had any interest in any that have liked me back.
So on a few nights at work that weren't busy we started talking and our conversations got...pretty deep. We talked about our opinions of love and about his past girlfriends and stuff like that. One night my brother asked me if I liked him and I didn't know how to answer because I wasn't quite sure yet--so I didn't say anything and he was like "oh so you do hahahaha". So now all of his friends know, including the guy in question. He didn't tell me that he knew. The guy I mean. He just left it alone and pretended he didn't know anything.
Well I finally talked to him about it because things were getting a little awkward. We talked for about an hour and a half. 1/4 of the conversation was about the subject at hand--dating eachother. The other 3/4 of the conversation was about other random stuff and joking around and etc. He said that when he heard about that I liked him he thought about it and considered it. He said he decided that I was really cool and cute and awesome but that I was just too innocent. He started saying how he has done such bad things in his life(of course i already knew about these things) and he said that we were just total opposites. I agree...we are. He's gothic and into metal music. I'm pre-med and love rap.
But...I think it was a cowardly excuse. He's only dated one type of girl--why not try something different? I'm not asking to get MARRIED here. All I care about is the feeling I get when I'm around him. He is the sweetest guy I have ever met. I don't care about how he has different intrests then me and is a little more experienced.
To conclude, I had that talk with him about 3 weeks ago. I have consistently had dreams about him everynight for about 2 weeks and I cannot stop thinking about him worth a dime.
I just wish that there was something I could do or say that would prove to him that it's not a lost cause and that it's worth a try. I don't really see what the big deal is. Any ideas on something that I should say? or do?
I've requested to my manager that I don't work on certain mornings in order to avoid him--so I can get over him. But the more I think about not seeing him at all anymore the more depressed I get. He really is a great guy. I'm literally down-in-the-dumps over him and that does not happen to me often. I don't know what else to do.
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It sounds to me like he was giving you a warning more-so than just randomly blowing you off. He's letting you know that he thinks you're a nice girl and he knows he'll end up hurting you because he's not that nice of a guy (relationship-wise). Listen to him. A lot of times women ignore the signals they get from men because they like them so much and they really believe they can "change" them or "things will be different with me". He's being straight up with you. It hurts, but you should take him at his word for now. In his own weird way he's trying to be a gentleman. As for the dreams, well, you were really hurt and he's on your mind and heart a lot because of that, so naturally it finds its way into your dreams. Continue to try to work other shifts and pursue your own interests. In time it will all even out for you and you'll be glad you made a level headed decision.
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Even if he's done bad things in his life, it doesn't mean he doesn't deserve a nice girl. Also, opposites attract! Why don't you try and schedule some of your hours so that you are together more, and just be like, "you know how you said we were opposites, well opposites attract, and everyone makes mistakes in life. all I'm saying is giving it a try might be nice."
I don't really know how your conversations go, but something along those lines.
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