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i love a boy whose in love with someone else...
this will be long, but i will return the favor to anyone who is generous enough to read(:
alright lets get the facts straight:
i just turned 19, the guy i like his name is joe, just turned 18. me and joe have been friends for about 6 years now. joe has been dating his girlfriend for 3 straight years.
the thing is, im IN love with joe. i've been in love with him but he loves his girlfriend. i cant get over him, we use to be best friends. we use to hangout ALL THE TIME, before his girlfriend came along.
i can't keep joe off my mind, seriously he's on my mind 24/7 im not kidding, i even dream about him (weird...) even when i was on vacation i thought about him. when im with my friends i think about him. when i'm at work, i think about him. when i'm with another guy, i think about him more. no matter what i'm doing or where i am, i think about him.
the HORRIBLE thing is, i can't get away from the situation. one of my best friends, is my cousin and guess what? joe is my cousins NEXT DOOR neighbor so everytime i'm at my cousins i get to see joe's girlfriends car over there and it kills every single time.
i'm SO vulnerable when i'm with joe. when we hangout alone, which is like hmm, once every FOUR months he always tries getting with me. i've never done anything with him but god i want to so bad. even though its so wrong because he has a girlfriend ive never been so comfortable with any other guy.
i tell joe alot, he's always there for me. when i cry, he holds me and tells me everythings going to be okay. when i laugh, he smiles. when i look sad he always knows and asks "whats wrong, cheer up" and even when i say "nothing's wrong..." he always knows there is.
i'm not happy unless i'm with joe. i see him probably once a month because hes with his girlfriend 24/7. she sleeps over at his house, he's been to her cabin, she's been on trips with his family and that hurts soooo bad. his brothers and sisters adore me, everytime i see them they scream my name and come give me a hug.
i've never told him i've had feelings for him but i know he knows by how i talk to him, how i flirt with him. but what good is it doing? i'm obviously not good enough for him to break up with his girlfriend. and i dont want things to be awkward between us.
i love how so many girls think hes hot, but no matter how many girls throw themselves at him he will never act different around me. his current girlfriend, has been his only girlfriend. the things he does sexual, hes only done with one girl, and thats his girlfriend.
i rememeber about two years ago this guy i was interested in broke my heart and all i could say is "i need joe, i need to talk to him" because he truly makes me happy.
i honestly don't know what to do. my friends say, move on. you deserve better than him. but its not that easy! i've tried, i cant just let someone whose been in my life for six years just go away like that.
we barely text anymore because of his girlfriend. his girlfriend is the ONLY person who makes me cry because i know that she has him, and hes the only thing i want.
any suggestions? i'm so lost. i seriously realized i love this boy. my heart is broken. it breaks everyday when i wake up and realize he's still with her. i've tried meeting new guys, it doesnt work.
anything will help!
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i know what you're going through...the same thing is kinda happening to me except that im not sure if i love him
and i know how much you must be hurting, but he has been with his girlfriend for 3 years so here's a few suggestions:
1. call him and tell him that you really need to talk to him about something incredably important(you can even say it's an emergancy), and when he comes over tell him how you really feel and tell him that if he dosen't aunoustly feel the same way that you guys can still be friends...(if he says he doesn't really feel that way about you, give him a couple weeks or so and he might come around for you)
2. dont talk to him for about 3 or 4 months or so and date like you never dated before(lol), try as hard as you can to get him out of your head, i know that you're thinking that you've already tried your hardest but i know that you can do better.
o snaps gtg
hpe this helped:)
good luck
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you need to tell Joe about your feeling..really theres not much he you can do coz he love his gf, he is happy with her. You cant try to make him like you if he doesnt.when u tell him how you feel , if he doesnt like you then its best for you to move on and let him live his life with his gf. if he have a little feeling and willing to be in a relationship with you than good for you. But no matter what do not try to break up their relationship because you really gotta think about his gf's feeling not only urs..it will help if you stop talking to him as well and meet other guys...3 years is a long time with her obviously he really love her..Im saying this coz ive been with my bf for more than 4 yrs and if a girl tries to break us up or love my man i would be furious and tell my man not to talk to that girl. you really gotta put yourself in her position no matter how much you love him. slowy move on if he doesnt feel any way for you.
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Hey.
I'm sorry about all of this. It does sounds horrible. But it's okay, you'll be able to get over him with time, I promise.
I've heard people say that when you want to get over a person you have to stay away from them, especially if it's someone like your best friend. I kind of agree with this because the more you see him, the more those feelings are there and the more you are reminded that you aren't with him.
I think you need to talk to him and tell him how you feel even if he already knows. Tell him that you really like him or if you want you can tell him that you are in love with him. And let him know that you are trying to get over him because you know that he has a girlfriend that he is happy with.
I'm glad that you haven't involved yourself with him in any way to make him cheat on his girlfriend. It's very tough to do what you've done because you obviously would love to, but you know that it would be wrong. Just continue to remember that if you ever were to involve yourself with him it would hurt even more to see him with his girlfriend after that.
It's probably better that the two of you don't see eachother very often. After you explain to him that you like him, maybe it will make you feel at least a little better. After that I seriously suggest that you do anything to distract you from him. You probably don't want to date anyone else right now and that's okay. You shouldn't date anyone until you feel you are ready to.
I am positive that you will be able to move on. I would recommend that you watch the movie (500) days of summer. It's a movie that just came out in theaters and it reminds me of your situation in a way. I think it would really help you deal with this knowing that you have someone to relate to. There will eventually come a day when you wake up and there are no thoughts of Joe (in a more than friendly way) in your head. I remember feeling exactly as you do now a few years back but eventually I think my body and my heart just got tired of suffering. I remember that when I saw the guy that I had been in love with, I felt no desire to be his girlfriend as I once had. I couldn't believe it because I thought that I my heart would break all over again when I saw him but it didn't. I was okay. And I was happy to see him of course because we were still best friends but my heart had finally accepted the situation and moved on. I know that this will end for you too. Just keep trying your best and try your very best to be happy. I wish you the best of luck. Take care of yourself. <3
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Hey there,
Ok firstly I know how horrible this situation is and how hard and hurtful it is its not nice for ANYONE to have to go through & im truely sorry its happening to you,but im going to give you straight honest advice from my point of view it might not be what you want to hear but I think its what you NEED to hear.
you need to ween yourself off joe,the feelings your feeling are not good and your torturing yourself with them really,it looks like youve let them take over your life.. theres so much to live for don't waste your time sitting around moping and depressing yourself over one guy,I know you feel like no one may understand at the moment but trust me I do Ive been there you think about him 24/7 and feel like youl never be able to stop but you can and you will.
you have to because the hard truth is joe is happy with his girlfriend and you just have to do your best and get through it.
you need to talk to him about your feelings and how its eating you up inside you need to get them off your chest to him,and tell him you need distance so you can truely get over him,
also its not fair of him to try get with you espcially when he has a girlfriend and he if you say hes really aware of your feelings towards him!?you say youve tried but have you really?
be hard on yourself dont let yourself think about him every time his name or something about him gets into your mind distract yourself away from it keep busy have fun live your life get out there. youve wasted too much time wishing you were with joe,your still really young think about it,is there any point at this stage?
you dont have to let him go,just let your feelings go,and just be his friend its do-able.
motivate yourself take up new hobbies go out more anything you need to start living again properly.
I hope I helped in anyway and that you do get over joe because it really is the best way.
Much <3
Jess
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