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beer and sadness
lately all my boyfriend and i do is fight, ive asked several questions on here about him.. this time i have a diffrent one.
when we fight he always ends up leaving and i feel so depressed that ill grab a beer or two or something harder like Jack daniels, Jim Bean, Smirnoff vodka, or anything really that we have i usually only drink at partys and that was only smirnoff ice but from partying with people who only usually drink bud light, i got a taste for it.. i usually party on fridays or every other partys and thats when i drink but now im drinking what seems to be a couple times during the week but thats only if i get into an argument i dont want to but its the only thing that makes me feel calm and i cool down and i dont feel depressed like a few minutes ago i cracked open a bud light because my boyfriend just left and i was crying histeriacllly.. and now i feel a little better.. its weird my dad is an alcoholic and someone called me an alcholic the other day and i dont think i am.. i barley ever drink.. does it sound like im an alcoholic? and i heard that beer makes you deppresed but i feel the happiest when im drinking.. what do i do? i dont want to be like that but its just what makes me feel happy..
im 17/f please help
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I would say you're definitely developing an addiction to alcohol.
YOU think you hardly ever drink. However, to someone else you drink a lot and you're only going to start drinking more.
Kids who have parents who are alcoholics are at risk to become alcoholics. Same goes for kids who's parents smoke, or kids who's parents were teen parents. It it what they grew up around, and it can become a cycle if they subject themselves to it. Alcohol is a depressant. It can make you feel happy for the time being, but at the end of the day, your problem is still there. It doesn't go away. You're just drunk so you think it's gone. It's still there when you're sober.
I think you need to stop drinking the alcohol, and break up with your boyfriend. Your relationship doesn't sound very happy, and if it's leaving you so upset to the point where you're drinking, it isn't very healthy for you either. You can do better than this guy. You need someone who treats you good. Arguing is healthy for a relationship, but with the way you and your boyfriend argue, it isn't. It's actually becoming dangerous to your health & you need to end it. It's not going to do anything but hurt you.
I suggest talking to a friend about your problem. Maybe even try and see a counselor. You're not a full blown alcoholic, but you're going to become one if you keep on with your behavior. If you would like, you can e-mail me to talk with me because I would be happy to help further. :) My e-mail is: 123abchristina@gmail.com
If you don't want to exchange e-mails for further help and would like to continue using this site, you can drop a question in my inbox. :)
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Well, I honestly can't say I know how much you have to drink to be an alcoholic but to me the drinking sounds like a routine that you have adopted which has confused you. Let me explain.
First of all, when you drink, after he leaves, you always reach for a bottle of something and then you gradually begin to feel more comfortable and relaxed.
Have you ever thought how it may not be the alcohol that has helped but merely the time on your own, which has allowed you to deal with your thoughts, take a step back from what has just happened and ultimately relax?
If this is the case then it is possible that your brain has simply made an association between the alcohol and being more relaxed, rather than what has really made you feel better which is the time passing and you dealing with your thoughts which lead to you being more relaxed.
If this is the case perhaps all you need to do is to find an alternative routine after he leaves, for example maybe you could intentionally sort out your thoughts and feelings after he leaves (blogs are a very useful tool for doing this, I’d recommend it, all you have to do is type away) or else talk to a friend.
That would be my first solution; however it may also be the fact that alcohol has become an escape for you from dealing with the problems. In which case I would strongly recommend the previous solution, as bottling things up isn’t a good idea, as well as finding a new healthier way to escape whether it be going for a run or to the gym to get some aggression out or else listening to really loud or really chilled out music, something that will distract you in some way temporarily before you go on and deal with whatever your feeling at a later stage.
So, overall I would say, personally, that you don’t sound like an alcoholic but it would be a very good idea to change that routine as eventually if the levels you were drinking continue to increase to much larger levels then it could be damaging in ways, as i am sure you are aware. I hope this was of some use and was clear enough, if not let me know x
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If you are drinking only two or three days a week you probably aren't an alcoholic, but it also depends on the amount you drink. If you drink ten beers three days a week thats thirty beers a week which is like three and a half a day. That could be considered a bit excessive. However, if you don't drink too much in terms of days of the week and amount consumed you probably aren't. But. The fact that you turn to beer or alcohol when you're unhappy does show a dependence on alcohol which can lead to much bigger problems later on like alcohol abuse, especially since oyur dad is an alcoholic and it usually runs in families. It's okay to drink every now and then because you enjoy it but you shouldn't use it as a coping method. I would suggest either finding another way to cope with your stress and sadness, or elminating the source of it so you don't have to find a way to cope. Hope this helped, feel free to ask any other questions :)
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