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help ! please :)
okay so me and my boyfriend are like straight up in love :) we've been together for like 3 years and we're only 16. well I'm 16 and he's 17. I haven't plan on loosing my virginity to him but now I feel that I'm ready but I'm just so scared. if we use a condom, what are the chances it might break or pop?
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You're scared, which tells me straight-up that you're not ready to have sex. You're ready (and you shouldn't have sex until) when you have no reservations about it. Once there's no doubt or worry, then you're emotionally ready, at least half way there.
The chances that it will break are high if you don't use the condom correctly. Don't double-up, and read the directions on the package, and follow them exactly.
But even with a condom, you can still get pregnant, and I'm living proof of that. I was conceived even with a condom being used correctly.
So, you have to accept that that is a possibility. You should probably get on birth control, though I don't really condone that, since I'm honestly only for sex after marriage, though I obviously can't control you.
Anyway, please be safe if you decide to have sex.
--Jack
(17/m)
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I rarely condone teen sex.
This is not because I'm all for sex after marriage (I'm actually not for waiting till you get married to have sex), but because you ALWAYS want to make sure you're 100% ready to have sex.
You want to make sure you know about all of the risks and how to prevent them, and I must applaud you for coming on here to do just that before finding out first-hand that there are lots of risks and dangers involved.
NEVER use two condoms at a time since it seems like you're actually protecting yourself to a higher degree. If you use more than one condom, the chances of said condoms breaking are actually greatly increased.
The guy should hold the condom while he is "withdrawing," or it will slip off, which greatly increases the chance of pregnancy.
Use brand spankin' new condoms - don't leave them in your car, or in the drawer in your desk for a year. They will become defective.
When used correctly, condoms have a 97% to 99% success guarantee.
Here's a study done recently: [Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
According to the Alangutt Macher Institute, "Participants' diaries recorded 34,036 instances of vaginal intercourse; latex condoms were used in 64% of the encounters, and in 33% of those cases, women also reported use of a spermicide. In all, 2% of condoms broke during intercourse, and 1% slipped (the study did not differentiate between partial and complete slippage). Other problems with condoms (e.g., they were not used throughout intercourse) occurred in fewer than 1% of acts of intercourse. Rates of breakage and slippage varied according to factors measured both at baseline (e.g., women's race, parity and education) and within the follow-up period (e.g., previous condom failure, type of partner and use of spermicide)."
All in all, there is a very slim chance your condom will end up breaking, however, make sure you're on birth control just in case...
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In a yearly statistic, for typical condom use, between 12 to 15 out of 100 sexually active women become pregnant (about 10% to 15%), and 2 to 3 out of 100 sexually active women becoming pregnant for perfect use (2% to 3%).
The highest ever recorded was 21 out of 100 (21%).
So that means condoms have a failure rate of about 3% to 14%, depending on whether you two are "typical users" or "perfect users." And since you asked such question, most likely you two do not know the perfect way to use the condom. Your chance of pregnancy is 12%.
ALSO,
Condom is a good method is prevent STDs (Sexual Transmitted Diseases), but as far as "preventing pregnancy" goes, it's NOT among the bests.
Birth control pills (oral contraceptive pills) put you at less than 2% risk of pregnancy at typical use (perfect use of the pills put you at less than 1% chance of pregnancy). It's a better method.
Besides birth control pills, vaginal ring and contraceptive implants are also good methods taht decrease your risk of pregnancy to less than 1%. But they require you to visit a doctor so . . . maybe not (because you are just 16 years old).
Of course, there are other more effective birth control methods such as sterilization and IUD, but they are either high cost or have bad side effects, not to mention that they require you to see a doctor, which, you can't.
As for whether you should do it or not, I have no idea. My teenager mind is saying "go for it, enjoy your time" but my brain is saying "no no, there are this, this, and that risk, and you are too young, and there are a few STDs that will affect you for the rest of your life, and so on so on." I don't know, hahaha. Another Advicenators columnist will have to answer that.
Hope this helps,
=)
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