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cousin overreacts.
I recently went to my cousin's house for her senior graduation party. This kid was there that I have had a major crush on for nearly a year now, so I was by him a lot. He likes me back, for now, so he was being rather cooperative. When I left that day, we were making plans to see each other again. Randomly, my cousin texts me telling me she doesn't want me and the boy talking, so in result, she will never invite him over if I am there. She tells me that we should see each other on our own time. She also freaks out about how all her friends have my number. On Friday, I'm s'posed to go to six flags with a bunch of her friends, but I didn't invite her because she doesn't know this girl I'm friends with that was originally going with me. She found out and is upset with me for not inviting her. I told her that she didn't get an invite because she didn't know my friend and because she always said she hated roller coasters. I also didn't think of inviting her because when she told me she wasn't inviting her friends around if I was there, I thought she didn't want her friends and I in the same environment at the same time. And then she went on to say, "Way to put friends before family" just because I didn't invite her this once. Am I supposed to invite her to every single outing I go on?!
So, what is her problem? Why is she acting like this? What do I do? & am I in the wrong for not inviting her and reacting the way that I'm reacting?
Thanks in advance.
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Don't talk to her right now.
She's cutting herself off from her own friends to spite you. The best thing you can do is take a deep breath, and let her deal with her friends, who will certainly ask her where she was and why she wasn't there, and who might also starting asking her why you aren't around.
If they ask you, tell them the truth, but tell them it kindly without gossiping or being a brat about it. Tell them your cousin doesn't seem to want you hanging out with her friends, and is angry you didn't invite her to 6 flags and leave it at that. Shrug it off and don't make fun of your cousin or call her names.
Let them say she's being silly. You just be polite and friendly when you do speak to her or about her. 'Cause the moment you are nasty, is the moment she is right. And you can't let her be right.
It would have been smart and nice to invite her, or to make sure of her friends have invited her, when you are going any place with her friends. So yeah, it was sort of wrong of you not too, but it was the kind of wrong that should have been solved by a simple 'Sorry.' You owe her that apology, but you don't have to take her shit along with it.
So if you haven't really apologized for not inviting her, the next time you speak to her you should. Otherwise, just ignore her behavior. The person she is hurting is herself. You are wrong for reacting with anything besides calm, and shrugging off her insecurities. Let her friends who have to deal with her day-to-day be the ones to deal with her. As long as you are nice to them, and respectful to her, things will work out.
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HELLO IM WIND.AND I THINK YOU SHOULD JUST LIVE YOUR LIFE BECAUSE YOU CAN'T MAKE HER TALK TO YOU BECAUSE OVER A MISUNDERSTANDING. IF ANYTHINNG ELSE COMES UP SEND HER A TEXT.iF SHE DOSENT REPLY THERES NOTHING YOU CAN DO. IM NOT SAYING GIVE IT UP JUST TRY YOUR HARDEST AND REMIND HER THAT BLOOD IS THICKER THAN WATER.LIVE YOUR LIFE SWEETHEART THATS ALL YOU CAN DO.AND TRY TO PLAN A EVENT THAT CAN JUST BE YOU AND YOUR COUSIN NO FRIENDS.AND IF YOU LIKE THE BOY DON'T BLOW HIM OFF BUT JUST TRY TO GET EVERYTHING KOOL WIT YOUR COUSIN FIRST.IM WIND AND THIS ADVICE CAN BE HELPFUL IM A PROFESSIONAL
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Hey there,
your cousin in my opinion probably feels like your taking her friends away from her,and is possible afraid that they might stop liking her and hanging out with her and liking you more etc.
its a common jealousy/fear issue and almost all of us get that slight feeling once and a while
she probably feels a bit left out maybe espically since you didnt invite her even though you were only going on the grounds of what she said so you were right and wrong in a way it was confusing.
your cousin needs to realise that your not out to like steal her friends or put them before her.
you need to talk to her and ask her whats up why doesnt she want you hanging around her friends,if she says because shes afraid your taking them then explain to her that your not.
and that youd love if you could all just be around each other and get along also include each other as much as possible with the friends make each other feel wanted etc.
theres no reason why you all cant be friends with each others
hope I made sense and helped in anyway =)
good luck
much <3
Jess [15/f]
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