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two year confusion
i have been with this boy for two years now. and when we first got together everything was perfect, never argued, had fun, and enjoyed are time together. but now two years down the line we; bicker, sit around, && our fun is watching movies.
its hard to explain but its getting kinda old doing nothing. even the sex isnt like it used to be. i still love him with everything i have and its hard to just throw 2 years of your life away. but am i getting bored of being with him? is this normal? is there anything i can do to prevent leaving him?
thanks,
18-female
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
This is normal so don't worry. Well, after being with someone for so long, it is quite understandable if you have grown out of each other. And this does happen, mind you. So don't beat yourself up over this, it is ok. Talk to him about it, and if you both feel the same, AND would like to fix it, then.. Get fixing! Do things differently, dress up/role-play, anything out of the box and new to the both of you. It should work. But when you do bring this up to him, make sure you're not making it all his fault, the BOTH of you are in this together so the BOTH of you have to fix this, that is if BOTH of you are willing and find this relationship worth it! It all depends on you AND him. Ask him something subtle, like if he feels the same about the sex, the feelings etc. fading.. If he does feel the same, you both are on the same page, a very good thing! Approach him gently, remember that. Ask him if he feels the same as you do, and don't forget to state that you DO feel a certain way etc. Communication is essential. If there ever is anything, talk to each other.
Ask Venzuela
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When you are with someone for a very long time (years) the spark in the relationship does fade a bit. The butterflies you feel when you first meet someone and start dating is very nice BUT once you two get to know eachother the sparks loose their touch.
I would suggest you plan something different to do then watch movies. Say go out dancing (if you like to dance) or go out for dinner & a walk at the beach. If he isn't taking the initiative of doing something different then you should. If you still love him and don't want this relationship to end then you need to help him lift the sparks...........
Try something out of the ordinary and suprise him. Being at a different place and unknown is very exciting and makes you re-live the love you have and the butterflies you two felt when you met...
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Well, this might sound simple (or complicated, depending on the type of people you two are) but try talking to him about this. Say exactly what you wrote here. You never know, he may be feeling the same way and want to change it, but he just doesn't know how to bring it up. Or you may discover that all the bickering and boredom is a result of the 2 of you growing up and moving in different directions (which is also totally natural). Regardless, nothing will get better if you don't air this out with him immediately. Sometimes its awkward to be so honest, but the results are usually for the best, no matter what they are.
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it happens. try to liven things up to break the routine. go on some random vacation(within your budget of course), make the trip an adventure if you can. you could also think of random things to improve your sex life along the same lines, find something thats seemingly "risky" or "wierd" thats still acceptable to the both of you, like roleplay..... one really good one is to have the guy dress up in a goofy ass leiderhosen costume, and pretend to be an american tourist who's trying to speak german and ask for directions, and the chick wears a nice Oktoberfest dress, with a little more racy cut to it of course, and takes the part of a seductive german girl intent on getting the tourist to bed.... I love that one. you could also dress up in a gestapo uniform and tie him to a chair pretending to interrogate him( "we have ways of making you talk" comes to mind). that was fun too. plus, it opens up your whole day for inside jokes with accents. and thats a really important feature of this master plan.
enjoy!
-gunner
oh yeah, almost forgot, I have the luxury of living in germany and dating german girls, but I'm sure you can pull it off or think of something similar within your abilities.
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