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turning her on
20/f
so my girlfriend and i used to always be all over eachother, but now we havent had sex in almost 3 weeks, what can i do to turn her on? she almost never seems to be in the mood anymore.
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I'd start it with a conversation.
Sex should always be a priority in a relationship. As with any other priority, it requires mutual agreement, communication, and compromise.
My girlfriend has a tendency to get stressed out, and when she's stressed she's obviously not horny. I have an incredibly high sex drive, I want it every day. She doesn't, at least, she doesn't when she's got other shit on her mind.
I have talked with her extensively, sex is a need, both guys and girls get emotional fulfillment and connection from it. I would bring it up calmly, and tell her that you miss being sexual with her as constantly and want to understand where the change in drive is coming from. It can be a touchy subject, just emphasize that you want both of you to be happy with your sex life.
Ask her if she's upset about something, stressed out or concerned and she hasn't shared it with you.
Hopefully she doesn't get defensive. If she does, stop the conversation for a second to both calm down, and maybe reconnect. In the past, when my I brought it up it was a sensitive subject and my girlfriend felt the need to justify herself. I'd stop her, ask her if I could give her a hug, and tell her that I didn't want HER needs to be unmet either, but that we both needed to be able to talk to each other about what we need because neither of us can read minds.
I told her I want to give her what she needs, and I want to make sure she's OK. But I also gently made it clear that allowing life to destroy our sex life and eliminate sexual contact for extended periods of time was not OK with me.
Its hard. It takes two people both acting like adults to have this conversation and immediately move forward with it. You both have to be OK with knowing what the other person needs, and you both have to be willing to place the other person's needs above your own.
Thats compromise. Sometimes, in relationships, you meet in the middle. Both bend, and you find a common ground to stand on together.
Other times, one person lets something go for the other person. Compromise comes in that you're both willing to place the other person's needs above your own, and you somewhat take turns for each other, one being strong when the other cannot, and switching when needed.
And part of that is being able to hear constructive criticism and being able to talk maturely about needs that are not met, without acrimony or accusations.
Take it slow, but bring it up. You need to talk it out, it won't fix itself any other way.
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most girls will back off if they are not emotionally turned on so the best thing to do first of all is too talk about it to her. if it's not a actual problem and she is just not in the mood, try maybe rubbing her skin or kissing slowly on the neck or behind the ear.
hope this helps !
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Sometimes when you are with someone for a while, you get comfortable and used to doing the same routine over and over again. That can be "boring". Doesn't mean that she is not attracted to you anymore, it's just time to switch things up! Try watching porn together or asking her what she would love done to her. Maybe even use toys!! The best way to fix this situation is by simply asking her what would turn her on. It's hard to guess around especially when you are used to doing what turned her on a few weeks ago. Just remember not to be stuck with the same ol' routine always try something new! :)
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You should take her somewhere romantic. Take her to the park at night or if there's a lake/beach nearby, take her there. She might not be in the mood if you two aren't going out on romantic dates. If you take her somewhere quiet and pretty at night, she'll be much more likely to get in the mood. While you're out on your date, be sweet to her. Hold her hand and tell her how beautiful she looks etc..
If you do all this and she still seems to not be in the mood, talk to her about it. There might be something bothering her that she's not wanting to talk about right now. Just tell her that you've noticed that she hasn't been as affectionate lately and that you want to make sure all is well with her.
Darby(:
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I'm not far from yuor age, and biting on the neck SO gets me into the mood,
take her out to a movie, and dinner, afterwards, just hangout around the house, or somewhere else where like the beach, or so.
Just try to do something sweeet,a nd that basically puts girls in a good mood, nd from there, just kiss, adn do your regular stuffff ( :
don't be scared to try new things!
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