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A hookup...except I want more?
I'll warn you-i used a lot of detail in this semi-lengthy story...if you could let me know what you think...it would be great, thanks.
I'm an 18 year old girl...turning 19 in 3 days. I was at a party with one of my good guy friends and I met a wonderful guy...he is 30. We had a bit of an innocent makeout-fest and he gave me his number and told me to call/text him anytime. We texted off an on for the next week...then I went home for the weekend (i'm currently in college and am living 3 hours away.) he got ahold of me friday night and asked if i wanted to hang out. I ended up over at his place at about 1:30 am..because he asked if i could pick him up from the bar. We talked for quite a while-and in this time frame i ended up being really into this guy-we'll call him Shawn. There was no pressure to do anything more than simply talk-er hang out like normal friends do. I initiated a kiss...this simple kiss propelled things to be taken into his bedroom..and you all know what happened next. After we were done-he laid there with me..I was wrapped up super tight in his arms...it felt so right. I had to be home before day break-so I left not too long after. Before I left-we kissed...and I said "I really don't hope I have to regret this..." Shawn said- "you definitely don't." He also told me he was into me. And He stated the fact that he doesn't care what others think of hte age difference.
Ok...fast forward to saturday night.
Shawn sent me a text relatively early that asked what I was up to...we had a bit of a short conversation via text message (i know, its an effective form of communication...((note:sarcasm.))...) and he invited me over for movie night. During the first movie, he sat in a chair next to the couch that I sat on...he got up to change DVD's and nonchalantly came over and laid on my couch-his head on my lap. We watched the movie cuddled up on his couch... To me this seemed rather reassuring to me because it felt so right...so couple-esque.
Right?
I figured that rather than seeming like the needy-immature-never-really-hooked-up-one-night-stand kind of girl...that i would talk to him on monday.
I sent him a message monday evening...and he said he'd get ahold of me later that evening.
He called me monday night. He explained that he couldn't be on the phone for long because he left his charger at home (he works out of town) and that he needs his phone for work. He also said he would get ahold of me...
And thats where my story ends.
I don't quite know what to think...because... A) I could be being over-analytical and stupid because maybe he really is into me or B) I could be analyzing correctly:the fact that it simply was a one night stand.
Thanks again for taking the time to read this-because the whole situation is driving me insane and this feedback will help me deal.
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It sounds like he's into you. If it were a one night stand, he wouldn't have told you to call him. He wouldn't have gotten in touch with you. He wouldn't hang out with you and just watch movies. Plus he cuddled with you and told you he was into you. From here on, I would play it smooth if I were you. Don't call him or text him anymore. Just wait for him to get in touch with you. You don't want to seem self-conscious or clingy. Put the ball in his court and let him make the next move. If he calls, great. If he doesn't, lesson learned. You'll have to move on from there and be careful about who you sleep with. But, in all honesty, this doesn't sound like one night stand material at all.
Hope this helps,
Darby(:
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He may want to move forward and into a relationship or he may not. I wouldn't call or text him anymore. He has your number, if he wants to talk to you, he'll call you. Look at it this way...If he doesn't want to see you anymore, then your calling him will make you look like the needy one and you won't be able to change his feelings anyway. He'll just perceive you as chasing him...a sign of desperation. If, on the other hand, he does want something more with you, then it gives you the upper psychological hand that you don't need to call him and can wait for his call. Let him chase you.
My opinion...you slept with him way too soon. There is now, nothing left to the imagination, which is a very powerful attractant. Anyway, what's done is done. Play it carefully from here on in.
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Well it looks to me like it's not a one night stand.
Because A, he called you after you slept together and ya'll hung out.
And B, he's 30 so he's probably not looking for that right now, probably more a serious thing.
I wouldn't over analyze it too much. As girls, we always tend to do that haha. He sounds like he's into you, so accept it. And if not, just be upfront about it.
"Look. I'm not really into this whole one-night stand thing, and I really wanna know if that's what this is or are we gonna move forward."
Trust me. It'll make your life so much easier and less crazy to know what he's thinking straight up.
-LoveSucks
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