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Feeling EMPTY!
I am 20/f my father moved out a year ago and things didnt end on a good note. I am in a very HAPPY 3 year realtionship. My sister just moved out and i live at home alone with my mother. I do not have any friends that I go out with so the only times I go out I go with my bf and his friends which isnt a problem because i like his friends. I just watched a movie called I Love You, Man. Its about a guy who doesnt have any friends and his fiance is woried he may become too clingy. I have that worry. I worry that I will drive my bf away or I will make him dislike things about it. Because of this worry or fear I tend to sometimes be emotional and cry infront of him. I do not like to let him see me cry I want him to never see the empty sad side of me. Me and my sister don't really ahve a friendship and me and my mom have NO realtionship. She is over clingy because she has no one, even though she has friends who want ot go out with her she doesnt want to, she just wants to be with her daughters and will ask me and my sister for permission to go out. She annoys me, she eats with her hands, chews really loud talks with her mouth full, IS CLINGY and always wants a phone call morning and evening to know where we are who we are with and what we are doing. I am afraid she may be the very reason I feel so UCK! When i was young i never went out much, my motehr didnt let me, I tried to join sports teams so i could get out and she wouldnt allow it. I blame her for not having good friends now and I just want to move out and live on my own, especially now that I have seen how happy my sister is, Im jealous. I am also going to school in september to work with kids and hopefully that will help. I need advice on how to fill my Empty hole. I speak to my boyfriend about this situation so much I don't want him to worry about me or our relationship. I don't want to talk about it with him anymore, there is nothing he can do. I don't even know what my question is. I just want opinions and thoughts on my situation. Please just tell me whta you think I should do!!!!!
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I think you should go for a jog....and I'm not remotely joking. Your emotions are getting the better of you...they can do that. Don't repress them...that's worse...get them out. All sorts of ways. Find constructive ones. At least then you are moving forward to a new place. Because the one you are in now...doesn't sound fun.
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Firstly, Calm down and take a deep breath and let me and you process this. Your mom, your sister, your boyfriend yor dad, all these people all I hear about you is a negative emotion or feeling. So what makes you feel good and I mean you! Not any of the above people you! For example, when I am the happiest is when I sing karaoke! I know silly right! But I do it for me because I love it. Its absoutely ok for you to be you and take some time for you where you can turn your phone off and in that moment you are your only responsibilty! Its ok! If your empty how can you truly give love to your bf? Or your sister or your mom? Its ok to take some time for you! Take some time and think about your life and what you would like to do with your life! Become responsible for the way you feel! Its ok and that I promise you! And next time you talk to your bf, try not to cry but explain how you feel and ask him for a solution. Men are very solution based! If he loves you he will help you with a solution so you feel better. And maybe try and help mom feel the same way, so she will try and have a life outside you but know she loves you. And maybe try and help her with the chewing thing cuz yea.... But Much Love, take time for you! And that's an order! :)
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