Okay so I'm 14 and my boyfriend is too. And I absolutely love him ! He makes me so happy and I never felt this way about a guy before. Like he's the first guy I lasted half a year with and I'm planning to stay with him longer. But we promised each other to stay together forever but I'm just scared that it won't last. I mean everything is perfect and we did have several arguments but we came through. But does forever really happen? I'm the type of girl who can stay faithful to a guy for a long time. And he is too but do you think forever is ever going to happen?
To be honest, your relationship probably won't last long. You're 14 and wants/needs change when you grow & mature and a few weeks from now, or even a few days from now, you might not want the same things you currently do. How you feel about life a year from now will be different.
Trust me, I'm 18 and am completely different from where I was when I was 14. At 14, I still thought I'd be living at home at 18, and going to college, and that I would probably have no tattoos or piercings (though I wanted them). Now I have 9 piercings, 2 tattoos, I'm out of school & I live 2000 miles away from where I was born & raised. Even 2 years ago I didn't see myself with most of what I have now.
Minds change, people grow & children mature into adults. Nothing is forever. But I can applaud you on one thing - way to make your relationship last 6 months. Most kids your age say they love someone after a day & then break-up a week later. So kudos for taking time with someone & making it last this long. If you do happen to keep going, I congratulate you. But, I hope this helped in some way. [ christina's advice column | Ask christina A Question ]
WittyUsernameHere answered Sunday March 22 2009, 4:05 am: It does not exist at your age.
One of the most overlooked and yet blatantly obvious facts about people is that people change.
You are not the same person you were four years ago. You are not the same person you were two years ago. When you're 16, when you're 18, when you're 25, you will at each point be a different person than you were at all the other ages.
There are core things about a person that persist, but alot of things including likes and dislikes, values, priorities, and many other details that make up who a person is change with time.
What does this mean? It means that just because the people you are now are compatible doesn't mean the people you will be in a year, or four, or ten will be compatible.
Theres nothing wrong with being in love. You need to think in shorter term, and I know thats especially harder for girls. The chances that you two will turn into people who are still compatible with each other down the road is incredibly small.
Right now, you aren't old enough to know what you will want when you are older. You don't have an adult perspective on the matter because you aren't an adult. I doubt you've had a relationship get to the point that you fight regularly. Thats how you really find out about a relationship.
My girlfriend and I are on her fourth year, and she's in her early 20s. The reason we aren't married is a combination of money, and not being ready to call ourselves full adults. Theres a fair bit of blissful irresponsibility before that.
But the point there, is that she was only a few years older than you when we got together, and four years later we're still hopelessly in love.
What got us here, was the awareness that our relationship wasn't "meant to be" or "fate", but rather a direct result of our _choice_ to forge a life together.
It has to be a mutual intention to communicate, work things out, and to whether the storms you will throw at each other. Before you can be with someone forever you have to want to throw them off a roof, and you have to be able to remember that you love them in the middle of it so that you don't.
Don't get caught up in finding the right person right now. Right now, you need to just date people, be in relationships, and pay attention to the things they do, what those things mean, what you like and dislike and what is a deal breaker. Right now is about two things, having fun and learning from it. Don't take things too seriously, just let yourself enjoy liking a guy, and enjoy having a guy like you back.
Last word, find someone you can talk to. I cannot, CANNOT stress how important this is. My girlfriend and I had a seven and a half hour conversation yesterday. Looking back over my life, I can relate directly how happy I was in a relationship to how well I could talk to that person.
ShelbyGirl15 answered Saturday March 21 2009, 4:23 pm: It's hard to tell, because guys aren't always the most faithful. Hope is all you need. Maybe your guy is a better than most, but I wouldn't get your hopes up if it doesn't last "forever". [ ShelbyGirl15's advice column | Ask ShelbyGirl15 A Question ]
bigflirtbabe answered Saturday March 21 2009, 3:18 pm: hey girl,
You and your boyfriend sound so cute. From what you said, this seems different than anything you've ever experienced. This is love, this is the real thing. Since its been 1/2 a year, and you've experienced some arguments you can last. It means its not just the cute beginning of the relationship that most people experience. As long as you both want it and try when ever things get rough, I believe that you can last forever.
Congratulations of finding what you have, hold onto it.
Eldritch answered Saturday March 21 2009, 2:16 pm: There are no guarantees on "forever".
Anything could happen, and it could either be because of you, because of him, or because of circumstances neither of you can control. You could be separated by a move, an accident, anything.
However, your chances of staying together for the long haul are mostly dependent on the two of you. Relationships are hard work. Like most other things, the success of a relationship depends heavily on how much you want it to work, how much you're willing to put up with, and how much effort you're willing to put into it.
You're young, and relationships at this age don't usually pan out... but as long as the two of you can be mature and realize that sometimes you will have to be apart (for school, for work, for whatever) I think you've got as good at shot at forever as anyone else.
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