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married friends who cheat
I am a 38 year old female.I have a long time friend, who I have worked with at two separate jobs. We both have older children. We have been involved in our childrens activities, and we have done a lot together such as shopping going to the beach and just hanging out. I have so much fun with her.I caught her having an affair with someone that I knew. Then, she confided in me, and told me of many, many affairs she has had. To the tune of about fourteen. At first I was angry but she would tell me, I was her best friend, and she needed to talk to me. Then it became like a book, I wanted to know more. Now, I am sick of it. I do want to be friends with her, because we can have so much fun and I am loyal to my friends. But it sickens me because of how she is. Her affairs are still going on. Bringing the subject up to her offends her and she tells me not to judge her because I am not perfect either. Should I just break off the friendship or tell her husband she is still unfaithful or what.
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Honestly,
I don't think you should tell her husband, Not only will it make matters worse for her but you will only be putting yourself in the middle of this mess more than you already are. If you do not want to be friends with her anymore that is your choice and you do have the right to choose your friends. However, You can come out and tell her you do not want to be her friend but I do think she at least deserves to know why even if she is offended. Honestly, (I wouldn't want to deal with it either.) Not only does it get annoying after awhile but hearing about the affairs your friend has been through only causes stress on the relationship with your friend. Tell her how you feel and why you do not wish to be her friend anymore and leave it at that.
BahaiMa22
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You have no business telling her husband.
If you want to remain her friend there is a simple way to do it: Tell her to stop talking to you about the affairs.
Tell her that even though you care for her and value her friendship, that you deeply disagree with her behavior and that is making you very upset. Since you still want to be her friend, ask her to respect your discomfort over the subject and not to bring it up anymore.
She'll probably get her back up a bit and feel 'judged'. All you can do is assure her that you are doing this so as to avoid judging her. Stand up for yourself and don't accept conversations you find unpleasant. It doesn't matter how flawed you are or what details you might have asked after before, what matters is that now you've realized these conversations are harming your love and friendship with her, so you need her to stop.
That might not be acceptable to her. She might be very offended, but at least you've tried to maintain your friendship and your dignity, and if she is offended by being asked not to discuss something that offends you, then the friendship is probably best to just let die.
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