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I officially have no "father"
Okay I'm 15 and a girl,I'm a freshman and for the last 2 years my dad's been acting all bitchy and just an asshole at me! >O
What the fuck?!
He says things to me that emply that I'm fucking around with guys! Which I'm not I haven't even had a real boyfriend yet!D:
So where's he getting this from?
He's been bitchin at me lately about having to buy me clothes,I barely have any.:[
Yet he gives my oldest sister money to fix her shitty car every time it breaks down;and he's like don't worry about paying me back.
What the hell?
So tonight my dad and I got in a nother spat about me going to the movies...All I asked for was ten dollars,ten fucking dollars ad he spazzes out at me!D<
He's like,"I don't have money for you to waste,I just want to go see Twilight with my bestfriend god is that to much to ask?
Shit and I'm not even going to eat,since they raised the price for the movie tickets..>->
So after he yells at me for like a good 12 minutes he finally gives me ten dollars,I say thank you and shit.As he's leaving my room he say,"I don't want any unexpected bellys in this house!
D:<
fgjhgkdj;
>x[
So at this point I've had enough,and scream like a maniac;yeah I know bad...U-U
But I couldn't take t,all I say is "What the fuck?!!! Why do you always say that shit,why the fuck do you always act as if I'm some whore?!"
He's like,"Don't talk to me like that,why the fuck do you always act like this when I give you advice for your own good!!!"
Okay one,he doesn't say it nicely he completly breaks me down and god I swear.So then he's like,"Answer me!" I'm crying and trying not to say anything so I just tell him to leave me alone.He slams my door and I run to lock it,meanwhile he's yelling at me still;"I don't want any assholes calling me! Fuck you pieces of shit!"
Then he says the final thing that completly breaks me inside and out,he says he dissowns me,and to never bother him again,that I never had a father so just to forget him....So since I have no "father" I just don't care anymore,I been thinking about getting snake bites,my friend's uncle is a professional piercer,he has his own shop and he'll do it for me.My socalled dad said I couldn't get my lip pierced,but this is someyhing I want,and since "I have no father," I'm thinking I will!:)
I'm just scarred that if I do and he sees iy he'll like...I guess hurt me or rip it out...He;s said it before and I just don't know what to do...=_='
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Well it sounds like to me one of two things. Your Dad could have a mental problem like bipolar mania or something. Or he could just be one of those people good at seeing patterns in people that can lead to a negative situation for that person. Whatever his reasons are; the abuse is unacceptable and I would video tape these tirades and report him to child protective services if it were me. But anyhoo.
He also is showing obviously preferential treatment towards your sister. This is also unacceptable.
Now sometimes older people can be like Judge Judy. If you ever watch her show; sometimes she'll just rail on someone for what seems like no reason. I worked in senior citizen care for about a year and old people can spot things that we can't. Like what your father may be saying is that he can see patterns in your behavior that he feels if you're not reminded constantly about his stance on it; then you will be susceptible to certain things and problematic situations.
He obviously seems to feel also that your sister is not susceptible to these same issues. REGARDLESS of whether this is the reason or not.
His behavior is exceedingly damaging and detrimental parenting. As for you, alot of times; a lack of trust from a loved one can lead us to do a lot worst things then we would've done if not accused. I don't think you should get the piercing. The only thing you'll be doing with that is hurting yourself.
The best thing to do is to try and find a life away from your father's abuse and cruelty. Find a group of people that are doing positive things. Success is always the best revenge. Believe me I've tried the other form.
I don't know your religion; but there are often a lot of really fun teenage groups at those really large churches. But if Christianity is not your thing; then, find out what you enjoy doing sports, shopping, art, performing, martial arts whatever; then emmerse yourself in that when you're not involved in school. Not only will you be super successful in something. You may have a new talent or skill that makes you more attractive to prospective colleges and may even win you a scholarship. Then also start to focus on the future; college and what you want to do in life.
The failure your Dad is harping on you about is simple to overcome. You're obviously a smart girl or you wouldn't have asked for help before you made a rash decision. Your father is obviously wrong about you.
Just remember, when it comes to failure; the age old saying is "most people don't plan to fail they just fail to plan." It's really that simple. Just be successful and leave him in the dust.
Now he may come around later and be your best friend or something may work out. But, sometimes parents just don't like their children. It's not always talked about; but it's true. Some kids; just like some adults rub their parents the wrong way. But, this usually only happens with parents that are intolerant; judgemental people all around.
I myself am a black sheep and may not ever get back into my family's good graces completely b/c of mistakes and past differences. And most people don't realize how important parental approval can be if not given; even for adults. But, once you realize you need it and you probably won't get it from these particular people. YOU CAN MOVE ON AND HAVE A BETTER LIFE.
One thing I got from working in elder care was 5 extra sets of grandparents that encouraged me and told me how talented I was in ways my parents never would. That experience for me helped mend my spirit in many ways and allowed me to begin to move on from the pain of my family's constant judgements and rejections.
My parents and family are still an important part of my life since I came from them. But, I am happy within myself and no longer am hurt by them and their controlling craziness. I also am building my life the best and healthiest way for me. That does mean making decisions that they would tell me to make sometimes or it can mean making completely different ones. But, the most important thing is to make sure you're not hurting yourself to avenge someone else who's most likely not even going to be affected by your actions.
Also, it sounds like you're the type of person that self destructs when things go wrong. Your dad may be the type of person that rails on the weaker people around him. That may be his motivation. I really can't tell. All I know is that he sounds incredibly abusive and something should be done about that. But, that action is up to you. And also you should just let God bring you a new father figure and sense of self worth through positive healthy outlets.
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Although I cannot particularly relate to you or your dad, I think the reason your father is the way he is is because of past experiences. My mom is always telling me "don't get pregnant, focus on education". She says that because she was a pregnant teen and had to miss out on her life to raise me. Maybe your dad is lecturing you the way he is for your own good. You have to also put into consideration about how the economy is right now. Gas prices were recently so high and many people lost their jobs. I'm pretty sure everyone is financially struggling and since your dad always has to fix your sister's car, money may be scarce. I'm not saying I side with your dad in this situation because I feel he has no right to scream and swear at you when he's the adult but try to picture yourself in his shoes.
As for the lip piercing, that's really up to you. The consequences that comes with it can be severe but like I said before, put yourself in his shoes. Make sure you really want the piercing and its not something you want to do just to rebel.
However, I think the best option is to sit him down and talk to him about how you feel. Let him have his input and if things get out of crazy, politely walk away and start the conversation again when things cool down.
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The idea that you have no father is somewhat pathetic and more than a little juvenile.
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My dad have gotten into fights like that hes even hit me, hes called me a whore, slut etc. hes called the police on me gosh i dont know how many times i had to go to court this past june because of him and of course i got nothing because i didn't do anything.I dont mean to pick his side i dont know the whole story but he is your father and no matter how mad he gets no matter what he says he will love you. and as far as piercings i wanted my tounge pirced since for ever and im still not allowed to get it. but i ended up with a child at 15 may have been to young. but i dont regret it. but my father still calls me a whore we still fight but some things are gonna happen in your life and your gonna need him. my mom divorced my father and started to date this guy who tried to kiss on me then he beat me up and i had a child i couldnt keep my son in the enviroment so my dad took us in. we moved to missouri and we still fight but ive never been so happy. and trust me i miss my mother like crazy and i wish shed care about me but deep down i know she does. your father means well try and sit down CALMLY and have a grown up talk
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