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how can i jst show him that i dnt care! that i can stop bitching n change
ok me n my bf have been 2gether since 2000! we have a 3 yr old son n we love each other! but he jst ignores me alot n treats me like im not here! but he treats other people all diff! hes all nice n respectfull 2 them but with me is a whole diff story! he always tells me that i need 2 quit carring about things he dose n i should jst care about that he loves me only! but i tell him but u dnt show me that u do! he says 2 quit bitching n nigging at him! that i need 2 change! n i admit i do bitch n bitch at him alot! its like everyday! but wat gf doesnt! wat can i do 2 change my attitude tores him! how can i show him that i dnt really care about wat he dose even dough i do!
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Do you know what he doesn't know? You kind of seem like you do, but you don't realize it. Let's see if we can put it into words. There are things that a man and women need to be too each other if they are going to live their life together. There is one thing that every husband and wife that reaches till death do us part, have in common. They are best friends.
Now, let's understand what you want deep down inside. Women, deep down inside want to be everything to one person. Here's where the trouble comes in, men want to be everything to everybody. He already feels, (wrongly so), he is everything to you, so he doesn't have to do anything but express his love to you.
So tell me, where does bitching and nagging come into to this, well, frustration. Big question, does it help, does it make him think? No, guys don't do that. You really have to spell it out to us at that age and older.
When you are alone with him and he doesn't have the Do Not Disturb sign hanging from his forehead, try talking to him about these things. Get him realizing that thinking he is solidly everything to you is wrong. Tell him when the day comes that he is your best friend and you can tell him all your, (play this up now), deepest darkest secrets, you'll let him know.
Remember now, once in a while we need to be bitched at, remember the old saying, "Behind every great man is a great bitch", or something like that. I think you'll find though, once he starts thinking about it, you will not find as much to bitch about.
Changing people from who they are, to who you want them to be is wrong, expecting them to take part in their own life is not.
Be well dear spirit.
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I'm sorry, but this sounds like a failing relationship. There are two things wrong here;
1) You shouldn't be needing to change for him. A guy should like you for who you are, not anything else. If you change, then he doesn't like the real you.
2) Why do you nag him? Constantly? It sounds to me like he's getting tired of it. I don't look to argue with my boyfriend everyday, and I don't know anyone who does. If there is no reason for an argument, don't start it! It's pointless, and useless to start something big because of something small.
So, I don't think you should end it, but I do think you should THINK about your relationship and TALK to one another. You need to TRUST that he loves you and wouldn't do anything to hurt you instead of assuming he already will. Just believe he loves you, he doesn't have to "prove it" if you two truly love one another. Hope I helped, goodluck.
-Jessica 14/f
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