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heartbroken, as always
18 years old, female...
i have the worst luck with guys. i've liked the same guy for like two years now but he's had a girlfriend of seems like forever. me and him are pretty close, and i'm sure that now he knows i like him. i know he is attracted to me too, and wants to get physical but obviously not going to happen since he has a girlfriend. when he says he wants to get with me i say, "you know i want to, but you also know there is always something holding me back.." and he'll be like and what is that i will be like your GIRLFRIEND. well tonight he texted me and we're suppose to hang out tomorrow but he texted me tonight and was like, what are you doing and i was like just with my friends and i was like how bout you and he was just like, with some dudes.. lets hang out. i said, i can't im with my friends AND your with your friends! and he was like i'll leave. and then i was like but i wont, see me tomorrow! and then he was like "fuck you tomorrow" meaning he wants to have sex. but we havent done ANYTHING keep in mind, not even kiss. and then thats when again i was like you know whats holding me back, your girlfriend. and he was like just don't think about it, we're like breaking away kind of anyways its not how it use to be (this is true i've noticed) and then i respond by saying well then please tell me why you're still with her and he said, "i dont know, i feel bad like to break up and im all close to her family and stuff and i would be pissed if she got with another guy" i know that it would be hard, i understand but i just don't get it so then i was kind of upset and was like "well you can have fun with her for the rest of your life" and he was like haha oh yeah. that wouldn't happen. i'm just so confused. don't tell me he's a jerk, not a good friend and everything else that may go through your mind i don't want to hear that. they have been going out for 2 and a half years which is long. they haven't had any other boyfriends or girlfriends except each other. I UNDERSTAND it would be extremely hard but for me, it's even harder. i thought they would end up breaking up, but when i heard what he said i was shattered, heartbroken, everything you could feel at once... if they broke up, of course i would give him alone time, i would give him freedom i wouldn't pressure him to go out with me or anything. i don't see how he can say he doesn't want to break up with her, but doesn't want to be with her forever? i'm so lost you don't even know...i still want to be friends with the kid but i'm completely head over heals for him and nothing or nobody will change that.
oh and this guy is 17.
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He wants sex. You make it sound like all
he has to do is break up with his girlfriend
and he can have you. Maybe she doesn't put out
or he wants something new in that department.
He knows you're head over heels for him and
he is trying to use that to get something.
A guy who truly wants to begin a new
relationship will break up. Breakups
always cause hard feelings so that excuse
doesn't fly. They are "kind of" breaking
anyway. More BS. He would "get pissed"
if she got with another guy" Big old red
flag! He cares for HER.
I know it isn't what you want to hear
but you have your head in the clouds.
He may be a really nice guy, but he
wants sex and the relationship will
cause you nothing but hurt. He wants
friends with benefits, you want a
relationship. Thats what it will turn
into.
Keep him at arms length until he breaks
up with the current girlfriend at least.
Don't just take his word for it either.
No for sure its over.
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I agree with you that it would be extremely hard for him to break up with his girlfriend. That is definately a tough thing to do. My concern is that he may be using it as an excuse not to break up with her. If he truly did not want to be with her, he wouldnt worry about things like her family or not wanting her to be with another guy. Things like that are just excuses he is making for himself not to break up with her. I was in a 3 yr relationship with a guy from the time I was 14 till I was 17. I broke up with him because I had fallen for another guy. Was it hard?? ABSOLUTELY. It was one of the hardest things Ive ever done in my life so far. But I did it and I made it thru. If he truly wanted to do it, he would too. Being that he's young and has been with the same girl for a while now, he may be wanting to experience other things, like hooking up with other girls. And you may be the perfect way for him to do that. Im not saying he doesnt have any feelings for you or anything like that. He probably does. But I honestly dont think that he would break up with his girlfriend for you. Its your decision if you want to hang out with him, but I think that if you do and something happens between you guys, you'll end up even more hurt and confused than you are now. If you do hang out with him, just be cautious. Dont get your hopes up. Chances are that if he hasnt broken up with her already, he's not going to just because you guys hung out and maybe hooked up. I hope everything works out.
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