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My bestfriend and I got in a huge fight over a boy.
Well, I'm thirteen and my friend has a boyfriend, and I liked this guy and then I found out that my friend liked him too. So this guy asked me out and then the day he asked me out he was telling me that he loved me. I was shocked and didn't reply back to him. Then, two days later my friend and I called him and he was being very shy and quiet. So, then we both were not speaking because he wasn't and he said "God, ya'll are so quiet do you even have personalities?" We started laughing so hard. Then he hung up and she told me that she really didn't like him anymore, and I asked her if I should break up with him. She said that I should. So I only did because I didn't want to loose our friendship over a boy she doesn't like. So, I broke up with him, and then the next day, he liked my bestfriend and was telling her he loved her, but she has a boyfriend and I told her boyfriend that she was cheating because she said that she loved him too. He dumped her and then she was all sad and the next day she said "I don't like Jake anymore" Then, her ex boyfriend asked her out again and she said yes. So they are going out for about two hours right, then she is back with my ex boyfriend. I get so mad at her and we get in huge fights about how I shouldn't have broken up with him and how she was jealous that I was dating him, and now we hate eachother. I really need help with this situation. I want my bestfriend back, but then we apologized and she made a deal that neither of us date him, but the thing is, I really like him, but I want to stay friends with her. What should I do? Please I really need help.(Sorry that this is so long.)
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
Let me make sure I have this right:
You and your best friend both liked the same boy. This boy asked you out and said he loved you. You had a phone conversation with him together, after which your friend stated that she didn't like him anymore. You asked if you should break up with him and she said yes. The next day he tells your best friend that he likes her, even while she already has a boyfriend. You tell her boyfriend and he breaks up with her. Then she says she doesn't like the boy, who told her he loved her, anymore. Her ex wants her back and after they get back together, she breaks up with him and gets back with the boy who said he loved her. You get angry and now you are both fighting.
Although you may not want to hear it, when you broke up with him, he was no longer your concern. You did not have to break up with him, but you did. Your friend may have been pulling your chain about not liking him because she knew he liked you, but in the end, when you broke up with him, she had a fair shot.
The bottom line: You are very young and relationships seldom last at this age. They are never very serious and never last for very long, while friendships can last a much longer time. The question to ask yourself is, which is more important to you, your friendship or some foolish boy who has pledged his love for two people in the span of a few days. Would you date a guy so fickle? What is to stop him from doing it again to you?
My advice is to save your friendship because in the end, it is longer lasting at this age. You could choose the boy and sacrifice your friendship, but when you and the boy go your separate ways, you are not only alone again, but you don't have a friend anymore. If you step back and let things take their course, apologizing for any wrong doings, you can save your friendship. You will find someone new but you will have your best friend still, and this is most important at this time.
I hope this helps and I hope it works out for you.
-Charlotte
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