|
friends with benefits: Should I do it?
deal is that this guy i have known since 6th grade has liked me so much im in 11th grade now and he still likes me and im starting to like him little by little but i dont want to be with him till after higschool because if i was to ever be with him i would want it to last and i think that in highschool it will make things too hard and he says he wants to be at least friends with benefits but i dont really want to because that will make things harder..im scared to be with him hes such a good guy and hes not bad looking and hes the only guy i can really talk to cause he knwos alot about me.but i dont know what i should do.we have both changed alot since 6th grade and i dont know if i should be with him now or wait.we dont hang out we just talk everynow and then.its kinda dull when we do talk.maybe we dont have alot in common and im forcing myself to like him..i dont know..i needd helppp!
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I dont recommend you being friend with benefits. You seem very intellegent in focusing in you studies and thats so COOL. Friends with benefits is another way of him saying i want sex! i want to just have sex nothing else just the benefit of having sex...imagine if you dont go to school but you want good grades or if you do not work but expect to get paid with health benefits...doesn sound right does it? he might sound nice but i wouldnt let him be my "beneficial friend" whos going to benefit you? him? or both? id rather choose a long term relationship that respects my mind, emotions, and body and will not try to take avantage of me and will work with me to reach that goal not try to score a goal. I hope this helps
]
How strong is your friendship bond? If you've already been this close for the last 5 years there could be a chance it would work out without ruining your friendship. It also sounds like you care a lot about the guy because it is pretty smart to not want to date until after high school, as most relationships don't last after those years. My best guy friend from middle school and high school and I became friends with benefits on and off until we were 21. (I'm 25) we are still close as ever and just don't have sex because we have our separate lives..so it is possible to be friends with benefits and maintain a lasting relationship of some sort. But there are sometimes complications and emotions that get too involved...so it really just matters on how strong your friendship is.
]
Friends with benefits is notttt a good idea. One of you guys will get attached bound to happen no getting around that one. Why not try dating? Highschool is all about a learning experience. You have to make mistakes and you have to get your heartbroken to make yourself stronger. Let highschool be your learning experience! Take a chance! Something great will come out of it either way. :)
]
hes not looking for a relationship obviously. he just wants the benefits (sexual attention).
dont be friends with benefits. it makes everything harder and weirder. you'll get more shy seeing each other around other people. then you may get attached, and get jealous if he's seeing other girls or vice versa.
]
Well, it sounds to me like this guy just wants to get in your pants. If you two have nothing in common then there's nothing to really base an actual relationship on. If you'd like to just bang him, them the FWB thing works great, but if you think you'd want something more from him you should wait till you're out of high school.
My best advice is to figure out if you're making a sexual attraction into something more. Ask him what he likes about you, if nothing that comes out of him mouth sounds like "intelligence, sweet, etc" and is all "legs, eyes, hair" then he just wants your body.
Once you know what you're dealing with, you'll know if you want FWB or a relationship. Wait for out of high school for the relationship though. It'll last longer.
]
More Questions: |