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school days
i didn't know under which category to put this in but what they hey.... the question is super silly but i'm really sensitive about this so here goes...
when i was in 1st and 2nd grade i was a super bully... i don't know if it helped that my dad's sister was the principle and owner of the school ( i swear i never rubbed that in and i never even realized why people REALLY feared me until later- read on i'll explain how)
anyway even sixth graders were afraid of me... needless to say karma gave me what i deserved ( i learned my lesson and i pride myself in being nice! honest!) for the rest of grade school up to like the 7th grade i was sort of outcasted... (or that's what i thought....but apparently years later i discovered that the group who shunned me were really the group who were least liked and people wanted to be MY friend instead of theirs but my old rep as a bully still made them fear me).... anyway i moved away and started fresh (though that wasn't any better because i hated school and absolutely love college)
here's the situation: the other day a girl from grade school added me on facebook... she was one of three (the nicest out of the others) girls i thought were the "cool" people...i am not sure how things are with them (since i moved countries) but i am pretty sure that they're still friends (it's a small town with one college and over overprotective parents) ..... so anyhow i am not sure why she added me (nope i doubt it's to mend the past because there isn't any past to mend... i had no issues with her at one point we were friends, but she decided to go with the other two girls, one of which absolutely LOATHES me.... i am a hundred percent sure of this....) so i am thinking maybe she added me either
1) because she is curious to see how i am doing now and how i've become (i've been gone for almost 10 years and because other -and i quote them on this- "none elitist group leaders" from their clique have me on their friend lists (these are people who generally were nice to me from their group and again i had no problems with them... or actually they had no problem with me)...
2) she wants to expand her list (she has over 2000 people... i mean who really really KNOWS that number of people well)
3)or because (as my other friends -whom i kept in touch with and met last summer- tell me i am a "cool icon of coolness" supposedly.... and thats how i understood that i wasn't really that uncool then) she thinks it would boost her social status having me on her list (seriously i doubt this just because i am not much into facebook and all the people i have, added me... so it makes me wonder y?)
4) maybe (and this is hypothetical too) because they heard that their last chance in nabbing the last "heir" of my dads fortune is being threatened by this girl who isn't from my hometown and is therefore not worthy........... my brother is engaged to a girl they've never heard of (oh trust me this is nothing compared to what goes on! its like a high class prostitution society....not that i am condoning anyone... whatever floats their boat as long as it doesn't rock mine)
i still feel like crap remembering how they used to treat me and how they used to make me feel... when my mum goes back to attend all the social events and so on these girls swarm around her asking about how i am doing since i never got to go back after going to school in england and after i started college in sanfransisco (and just like any naive mother... my mum tells me that my "friends" are asking about how i am doing......seriously wth???)
sorry for the improper grammar it's like 3 am here...... but i really need advice... should i add her and open that gate? or just i just ignore? (and would that look like i am afraid to face the past???)
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
It really sounds like they want something. After all, it's been ten years and it sounds as if you haven't heard of them during those 10 years. And all the sudden you've been friend-requested and they've been asking about you.
If I were in your spot, I would accept the request. Then, you can hear what she has to day (most likely you'll receive a comment or a message). The minute she does anything unsettling, you can of course remove her from your list or even block her. It's entirely possible, though, that she just wants to re-link with an old friend.
But if you absolutely don't want to add her, there's nothing wrong in it. It's your life and you deserve to be happy. You sound like you've grown into a great person, and obviously those years which shaped you are not years you want to return to.
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