**15/f**
I get weirdly nostalgic about things. I can't throw away stuff from when I was younger because I'll just have this guilt tugging at the back of my mind forever. Like, three years ago I gave away my dollhouse and I STILL feel guilty about that.
And then when I look at old pictures I cry because I know that I'll never get to go back to that time in my life ever again. That's why I can't throw things away, because I feel like I'd be throwing part of ME away. Does that make any sense?
I gave away two old Britney Spears CDs last year because I figured because I don't listen to them so why still keep them? Well I felt so guilty (over throwing out CDs of a singer I clearly don't listen to anymore) that I had to go all the way out to the store and replace the two CDs. And now they're back on the same shelf they were before, collecting dust.
But it's nice to know they're there.
Weird right? I really hate this, it sort of takes over my life you know? Is there any advice out there that could help me get over this?
Compulsive hoarders keep a slew of random items and things other people would normally get rid of. They feel like if they throw away certain things that something major will happen and they will need them. Sometimes they just feel guilty throwing them away so they don't.
One woman struggled for months trying to throw away ONE sticker. She, of course, is an extreme case but it shows you that these sorts of things really do happen. She was afraid that when she threw the sticker away she would find a place that "needed" it or someone who really wanted it. She would put the sticker in the trashbin and within a matter of minutes would literally be having an anxiety attack over having thrown it away. Of course, she pulled the item out of the trash many times.
It's okay if this is you. There is help, therapy, and even group meetings you can join.
From what I've gathered, it starts off with a few things that a person simply feels they cannot get rid of for one reason or another. It ends up escalating to keeping things like a few years worth of newspapers, hairbrushes with broken handles, paper bags, yogurt containers, etc.
Here is some tales of compulsive hoarders from ABC News:
These compulsive hoarders also feel that it is taking over their lives. I would highly suggest therapy specifically for this problem and also group meetings if available in your area.
I would also suggest not to jump right into medication as treatment because this may be a learned behavior from when you were a child (example: When you were little someone gave away a doll that you really wanted to play with. You never got to play with the doll again and felt bad about it) You not even be aware of it, but there could have simply been a childhood issue that caused this. As a note, hoarders rarely respond well to medications for OCD disorders.
Here is a link about meetings for Clutterer's Anonymous:
Hoarding behaviour is also related to obsessive-compulsive personality disorder (OCPD).
It might not even be something as severe as that. It could simply be what you said: "...I feel like I'd be throwing part of ME away." Maybe that's all it is. Some people have problems letting go of their past memories, and this could also stem out to not wanting to grow up. It could, again, have to do with a childhood problem that you may not even remember now or that you think wasn't a big deal after all. It could be as simple as losing a favorite toy when you were a child and feeling sad for days/weeks over it, and subconsciously you feel that you had essentially lost a part of you and a part of the happiness you once had.
Any way it is, I do recommend you speak to someone to see if you can work out what's going on.
We aren't licensed therapists or anything so you really need to see a professional for proper diagnosis and treatment.
I hope you seek out the right sort of help for your problem and find yourself guilt-free later in life. If you have any more questions please feel free to ask me! :) [ Peeps's advice column | Ask Peeps A Question ]
fruitloop_91 answered Sunday August 17 2008, 12:39 am: Yes I agree with the last comment placed. It would help if you can approach a trusted adult, or older cousin or sibling and ask them to contact possible counsellors or support groups to find out more about your situation. If it's OCD, there's definitely effective help out there for you, so the first step is to reach out and ask for help. things will fall into place from there on. Good luck:) [ fruitloop_91's advice column | Ask fruitloop_91 A Question ]
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