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somethings wrong with me.
so this year it was my second year at a sleepaway camp. i loved this camp last summer, i had the best time of my life and i loved all of the people and made so many friends. this year a little bunk mixup happened and everyone blamed me for it because i requested two people that didnt request me. it didnt end well. before camp started, the bunks were back to normal and everything was good. on the first day i decided to swicth back into my old bunk, the one i was in last year. even though i was friends with the bunk i wanted to be in this summer. but they were ignoring me so i felt left out and switched to the bunk i was in last year. anyways, the whole summer i had a horrible time and cried every single day. no joke. so after a while i was fed up and was allowed to leave camp and come home. this happened a few days ago, august 8th actually. so now ive been home 3 days in a row because my friends are all busy. or at least they say they are. it really upsets me. i feel like my friends dont really like me anymore and i dont know why. this is the same feeling i had at camp. its not that people were mean to me at camp, i was just left out of everything. and it really hurt me because i thought these people were my friends. and i didnt know why they were doing it. i got home and texted all my friends to see if they could do anything and all of the replies said im sorry i cant :[ but i keep asking different people for different days and there ALL busy. i feel like the biggest loser ever. every year i go to long beach island near the end of august, and i NEVER ever have anyone to go with. no one. i always ask all my friends and they are always doing things. it really makes me sad. and i just feel like i dont have any friends anymore. i do have two best friends from my old school, but they are always busy. btw i forgot to mention i switched from private school into public school last year going into freshman year. it ws really hard for me because i can be really quiet at first. i had some in school friends but not that many outside friends. i lost two close friends i met last year. it was a hard year. this year im going into school feeling like i have no friends and im just so nervous. i dont know what to do anymore. its also embaressing becuase my sister who is going to be a senior has so many friends and shes always busy and so far ive done nothing ever since ive been home. i just wish i belonged somewhere. into a certain group or something. last year i had scattered friends, i was never in a group or anything. ive been having weird thoughts ever since the middle of camp, when i was having a really bad time. even now when i get upset i have these thoughts about like cutting myself or sometimes i think what it would be like if i killed myself. i dont think i ever will but sometimes i think about it. its really starting to worry me i dont know what to do anymore. and i cant tell anyone these things. help me
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Want to answer more questions in the Health & Fitness category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Mental health?
First of all, I'm so sorry about you not being able to have fun in camp.
I know how it feels to want to hurt yourself or kill yourself, but you really shouldn't do it.
You need to think about your family & how upset they would be if you killed yourself.
Is there any way you could possibly talk to your parents about how your feeling, so that they can maybe help you see a counselor? I'll be the first one to tell you that talking to a counselor helped tremendously for me.
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hey, im sorry that you feel so left out. I can relate to the switching school thing, because I went to catholic school for nine years and went to public for highschool. I do feel left out of things too sometimes, everyone does feel like that. I really wouldn't blame yourself, I'm sure it has nothing to do with you. My friends are all busy too, they work. I don't want you to have thoughts of killing yourself or cutting, thatll make it so much worse for you. I know you're feeling really left out, but is there some kind of activity that you love or are really good at. If you try new things, like for instance in highschool join more clubs and do a sport or 2 b/c youll meet different people that you have stuff in common with. Also, you become a family with your sports team. I did that with soccer, it gave me a new form of being wanted, and i didn't feel left out. you really got to find your niche. I had trouble with that, my thing though is acting, so I have friends from my drama class, because we have that in common. does that make sense?
Since this is a start of a new year, what you need to do is, take these next couple days and do some real soul searching, look inside your heart at the person you are becoming. Sometimes in order to get a friend, we have to be one to other people. Thats kinda hard, b/c its so easy to get lost inside problems that seem so big, ya know? ANyways, think about who you want to be this year. Okay lets break this down, think about your favorite celebrity, your best friend(s), someone in your life that you really truly admire. What are the qualities that you like int hat person? Once you name them, write them down, and see if you want to be like that too. I know people because I put myself out there, I try to be as optimistic and as nice as I can be to people. I am by no means popular, but who cares, I try to help people every chance I get.
When you think of good qualities in the ppl around you, it somehow can inspire you to be more like that person. Now I'm not saying, try to be like everyone else, b/c thats how you lose yourself, you have to find your balance, you know what makes you who you are. Personally, I would love to sing like Carrie Underwood, but we have one of her, we don't need 2, shes her own person, so you need to be too. Am i making any sense?
What I'm really trying to say is its okay to feel left out, and its okay to talk about your feelings, if you talk to your friends, maybe they dont realize theyr hurting you.
And as for the things that are haunting you, write them down, write them all down. It will help you get over anything, if you try to write a song, just lyrics even. The feeling are raw and original, they tella story, and writing them may help you discover who you are and who you can be. Look in your heart, the answers waiting for you to find it.
I really hope I helped you. I've been in the same boat, the no friends, switching schools, being left out, thats when I started doing soul searching. I don't know who i fully am yet, but i am finally comfortable in my own skin.
Good luck with everything, if you need anything just let meknow. :) all the best!!
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I went threw the same thing with my friends, it always seems like they never want to hang or they had something to do, then i got depressed and cut myself too.
theres nothing wrong with you
alot of people go through things like this
i'm serious, your not alone
i decided to throw a pool party at my house and called people to come over, and told them all of our friends were invited.
Everyone ended up coming and we had an awsome time, dancing and eatting pizza, after that everyone felt closer
maybe you could try the same thing with your friends, camp friends, old friends, new friends
all of them
also when you ask them if they want to hang and they say there busy, ask them when there free, say something like "well when can you hang cause its been forever since i've seen you!"
i think its going to work out for you, i really do
keep faith
don't hurt yourself
and if no one wants to hang, pick up a book,
no joke, reading is a million times better escape then cutting.
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Oh sweetie, cutting or suicide is not the answer. Trust me. I was depressed throughout this year, and one night my mom and I had a huge fight, and I just felt so....sick of it all, that when I was in the bath, all I could think about was negative thoughts, like how much I hated myself, and I ended up cutting myself. Well, I got addicted to it, and it was bad, because I did try killing myself. It didnt work, obviously, cause Im still here, but I did have to go to therapy, and thats when they diagnosed me with depression. I dont think you have that but it does kind of sound like your in a slump or something. Im kind of in the same boat, as far as not having any friends to hang out with. Dont get me wrong, I have plenty of good friends and stuff, but they are also busy with work or family stuff, and yes, it stinks, but you just have to remind yourself that they dont hate you, there not mad at you, there just soo busy. Maybe you could try doing something yourself. Like play a sport or something....good luck sweetie, you'll be fine!!
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