|
sex question. emotional? girl
i am 14 years old, and about two months ago i lost my verginity to my 17 year old boyfriend. we werent even going out for 2 months yet, and we didnt even know eachother for 3 months. but we were both vergins and i know he really wanted to lose his verginity. and it was prom night, so it was kind of expected. i wanted to have sex with him, but i never wanted to become who my friends are who lost their verginities at 12 and 13. there is something seriously wrong with my town where girls thing its okay to have sex in junior high, and i know its not wrong. i dont feel like i was pressured into sex but i feel like i wanted to wait and now theres no turning back. and me and my boyfriend are incredibly close and i know we'll be together for the rest of my high school and i honestly want to grow with him into a family when we get older but i just dont know if i feel right about this.. like when im a parent, and my kids ask me when i first had it, im going to have to say 14 and im going to have to live forever knowing that i was a little slut. and im so worried that im going to like emotionally break down because i worry too much about this.. i dont know what to do, should iu stop having sex with him? even though theres no turning back, and i do enjoy it.? i just dont know. and i absolutly cannot talk to my mom about it. she believes in sex after marriage and expects me to stick with it. and she would deffinitely dig a hole and burry me in it if she found out.. please help
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Sexual Health and Reproduction category?
Maybe give some free advice about: General Sex Questions?
first of all dont put yourself down and call yourself a slut because you arent for having sex. Your right theres no turning back now so do what you feel is right. If its bothering you while your having sex, i would stop but if you really enjoy it & feel comfortable doing it go ahead. Be careful of the guy though because he might hurt you in the long run
]
ok first of all ...the likelihood of you staying with the same guy is very low. You are being very naive to think that. Sorry.
14 is a very young age to be starting to have sex. If you are so unsure that you are asking for advice about this then that is a big red flag that you are not ready and should stop asap
sex brings many things... baby, stds, and if sometimes even death (AIDS) I would seriously think this over.
hope i helped
]
theres nothing you can do to take back your virginity.. maybe if you stop there is a chance u wont feel so guilty about it ya know? just because you had sex does not make you a slut , it makes you young and adventuorous, , if you enjoy doin it. then i dont see the point in stopping ,but at the same time you have got to be carefull there are plenty of deseases and stds that are out there so make sure that you always use protection....or you can get pregnant. if you really like him and he really likes you . a thing like not having sex shouldnt stop your relationship from growning and if it does stop it then , maybe you should overlook the situation
chanel
]
"there is something seriously wrong with my town where girls thing its okay to have sex in junior high,"
- First of all, I just want to say, there's something wrong with this country because this is happening everywhere and it's so sad...
Alright, back to your question. I don't mean to come off as harsh at all, because that is NOT my intention, but you need to really face reality here. You're with a 17 year old and you think you're going to spend the rest of you life with him? You're so young! You have SO much life left to live, please stop thinking you've found "the one" at age 14. Just because you think you'll be together forever does NOT mean you have to have sex with him. I just wanted to get that out of the way, because I don't want you to feel as though he's the only guy worth dating and that you have to have sex with him.
Next, if you're questioning whether or not to continue having sex with him, you probably should stop having sex with him. If you are in any way uncomfortable with it [regardless of if you enjoy the actual act or not], then you shouldn't push yourself into it. If you're feeling ashamed about it, stop doing it! If you're worried about breaking down, it must be having a much larger affect on you than you're telling us. If your boyfriend truly cares for you, he'll understand =]
Finally, I don't think you're a "little slut", and I don't think you should either. Don't feel bad about this, because you can make it better. Instead of telling your kids you "lost it when you were 14", you can say, "I made the mistake of losing it young" or something alone those lines. Also, you've learned from this experience, which makes it a little less worse.
I hope you make the right choice!
ps. "verginity" is spelt "virginity". Just thought I'd inform you =]
-Laura. (16-f)
]
If you feel like you will be with your boyfriend for a long time and you enjoy it then do it. If you are afraid of people giving you trouble about it calling you a slut just keep it personal. Tell your boyfriend that you would prefer if he didn't tell anyone about your sex life.
And do not feel bad about having sex with your boyfriend your not a slut for having sex with him. You are just expressing your love for him and willingness to give yourself to him.
And lastly about the "what will i tell my kids?!"
Simply tell them the truth. You were in love and you expressed it with your boyfriend.
They wont give it a second thought =]
Hope i helped
~InsaneChildz~
15/m
]
I lost my "virginity" when I was 14, and I don't consider myself to be a "little slut" - I'm now 17 actually, and i'm still with my boyfriend.
Every once in a while I question my decision on having sex in highschool. I wonder the same thing you do; What am I going to tell my kid some day? But the truth is, there IS no going back. So why regret my choice? I chose to have sex, because that is what I wanted to do. So why question my decision now? There is no point in it. I'm sexually active, and i'm not afraid or ashamed to admit it. I know a lot of people on this site look down at me for it, but the truth is I DON'T CARE. I DON'T regret my decision. I am very happy with my boyfriend. I've been with him for 3 years.
When someone comes onto this site and says they are 13 or 14 and they are wanting to have sex, I try to explain to them that it is a huge decision to make. One that can honestly and truely change their lives, and it can. I try letting them know the downfalls, but that I too wanted to have sex at there age and I did. And I don't regret it. I try giving them both sides of the story.
Here's the thing: If you enjoy having sex with your boyfriend and you think the two of you will be together for a long while, then still have sex with him. People ARE going to give you crap about it, but they don't have to know if you don't want them to. If you would prefer keeping your sexual relationship to yourself, tell your boyfriend that. If he doesn't respect your wishes, it's time to get a new boyfriend. If you don't feel you want to continue having sex, because you'll regret it, then don't.
It's simple, really.
]
More Questions: |