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Boyfriend taking me for Granted?
So lately i feel i have hit a rut in my relationship. I'm 20 and so is he. I'm taking a summer coarse from Monday to Thursday from 8-2 so that doesn't leave the day to see each other but he works anyways or he has baseball. he calls me every night, texts in the morning and calls me in the afternoon as well. But i feel like hes taking me for granted. He doesn't plan anything or gives any effort. Is it just me or is it because were so busy that we don't have any time for each other? or is it just because hes a guy that he doesn't do anything? I miss him and want a spice in our relationship. I'm feeling a little jealous because hes always busy with work, baseball or friends. i feel like they come before me. i have a weird feeling about it all and i dunno what to do. What do you think on the situation?
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I think he is putting in effort to talk to you by calling you and such. You both have a busy schedule so maybe one day when you both aren't busy, you could call him and maybe plan something. He might not know how much you have been missing him. You both are busy so try to get together soon. I hope everything goes well for you.
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Honestly, the only way you're really going to resolve this issue is to open up and talk to your boyfriend about what you've been thinking.
To me, he's putting some effort into the relationship by making sure he texts and calls enough to make you feel secure; however, I am curious to know what YOU have been doing on your end of the relationship.
Relationships are give and take. You cannot expect for him to make all of the plans and suggest everything for you two to do together. If you want to do something with him then make an effort and tell him what sounds nice and enjoyable. A good way to start is by saying something like:
"Hey, you know...we don't really get to do much lately because of our busy schedules...but I was thinking about how nice it would be to see a movie with you [day/time you are both fairly unoccupied]. How would you feel about that?"
It may also be beneficial to say things like:
"You know, I felt really good and had a blast when we [went to a place together/did something neat together]. We should [do things like that/go to places like that] more often."
And make sure you always let him know when you're free and wanting to do something with him:
"I'm not really going to have anything to do on Saturday and, from what I recall, you don't have a game or work that day either. I really would love to see you if you don't already have plans."
If you don't let him know that you're feeling he's uninterested in you then he won't know what to fix. He may feel the same way you're feeling, or may believe that you are simply too busy and too tired to be bothered by going out so he is trying to give you resting time. A lot of times, a person gets caught up in their hectic life and simply feels that their mate is feeling the same about their own life--it isn't his/her fault, but you need to make them aware of the situation.
Communication is everything in relationships. If you don't tell him how you feel and he doesn't tell you how he feels then you aren't ever going to be able to get through anything together. Open your mouth and spill your guts!
If you enjoy some place then make sure you let him know so he is aware that it makes you happy and he can note to take you there more often. Express interest in things you wish you two would do together. If he doesn't know you're interested, he doesn't know anything. The guy doesn't know that you are waiting on him to make a move--either let him know or you make the move yourself.
You may choose to let him know that you have been feeling like he put you on a back-burner lately, but don't be too harsh about it because he may have had good intentions on not pressing you for time. Let him know that you really do wish you two would be together more often and you do appreciate his efforts in the relationship by keeping communication constant.
Don't be so hard on the guy.
He really isn't a mind reader.
In short, express your concerns to him. Let him know what makes you happy. Give the guy a chance before saying he doesn't really care about making you happy.
I hope things turn out for your relationship.
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