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How to help a friend find someone
Alright. I have this friend. Lets say, Ed.
Ed is a nice guy. Ed's the kind of guy whom every girl always calls "A nice guy" He's also the kind of guy who can't get a date to save his life.
No advice Ive given him has worked for him, no advice anyone else has given him has worked for him. No matter what happens, by the end of the night he's alone and no one accepts his date invitations.
So now he really likes this girl. This girl is really into another friend of mine, who isnt into her. But shes chasing him and Ed's chasing her.
Ed has no idea. This girl accepted an invite to a Karaoke bar, he thinks its a date, she thinks hes a really nice friend.
My room mate asked her bluntly if she was interested in him, and she made a face that said "hell no" to us.
As friends, we arent sure if we should tell him. She has a very obvious lack of interest in him and once he notices he's going to be really hurt, and his confidence will sink that much farther.
But if we tell him, he'll call off the plans. If we don't, he's going to think he's on a date, and all that implies.
And he's probably going to be even worse off.
Advice?
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You should tell him. He's not gonna like it, but it's better than him making a fool out of himself, you know?
Everyone has a friend like that, who's hopeless when it comes to dating. The thing is that no advice you give them is ever going to help. They have to figure it out on their own. It sucks, but that's the way things are, it's what growing up is about.
And it all sucks.
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you must reasure him that if he is such a nice guy, someday he will get a date or even get married. Guys that are that nice will be taken in the end. Some girls don't realize that looks really don't matter as what the guys really are. Most girls who would want a guy who treats them right would pick someone that they know would. i think that if he shows that kind of personality, in the end, somebody would go out with him. please reasure him because i know guys like him would probably not stay single. hope i helped!
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You have to tell him.. tell him so he doesn't feel stupid, get used or be inclined to think that the outting is more than it really is. He's too nice of a person to be betrayed or misled. OR since your female friend is so blunt, perhaps she should contact him to make sure they are on the same page and allow him to make the decision of he is interested in still going or not.
I am not sure of why he can't get a date, perhaps he has insecurity issues and it shows when he is asking someone out. NO one wantst to talk, date or befriend someone who has insecurity issues or may be shy or may not have confidence needed to secure a relationship. There is someone out there for him, he just isn't going to the right places to meet them, especially if he is only staying in your inner circle. Encourage him to go places and do things. I am not really sure of his interests, but if he is kind of "geeky" meaning that he has no conversation, has no interest and is just boring then that could be a factor.. he has to find out some things about him that aren't really regarded as attractive and push females away from him and change it.
He must be patient so that he doesn't just jump on anything or let anything jump on him because he will end up hurt, used, betrayed and disappointed. He must be selective, cautious and aware.
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