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Said things in anger
I'm 18 and my bf is 19 we've dated off and on for 2 years.
Today we got in a huge fight and I said somethings I didnt mean. We had just got back from a weekend vacation and he was looking for his cds that I had put in the trunk. the trunk was packed with stuff and his cds were buried. he started digging around and I wanted him to take out my suitcase so we could find it. I guess I was yelling at him and he got angry and threw my suitcase out on the ground. I lost it. I was so mad. then I asked him "So are you going to act like this from now on" and he said yes so I said "well maybe we shouldnt be in a relationship then"
I regretted it as soon as I said it. I really didnt mean it. I was just mad at him for acting like a jerk. He is really really hurt and said he doesnt even know if i really love him. I do love him and I told him that but he is really hurt and wont talk to me. I apologized but I know it wont make up for what I said. What should I do. I really do love him and I didnt mean I wanted to break up.
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okay, chill. If you say you've apologized then it's time to move to plan B. Send him a cheese pizza with m&ms.The catch is you have to spell the m&ms into a message that says I'm Sorry. Make sure you deliver it to him and do the puppy dog pow when you give it to him.
Thanks and remember to come back for more advice.
volunteergirl
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Oh the poor little guy, you hurt his feelings. No really, if he's even half a man, he knows what he did was wrong and it is partly the reason he clammed up. Being proud is good, but in this case his pride is making him shift the blame on to you. You told him you were sorry you said it, so leave him pout, don't capitulate.
The one thing I would talk to you about is, reacting to a situation, rather then acting upon a situation. Reacting is what gets us in trouble and makes us say stupid things like that. Always take one step back find the second you need and act instead of reacting. I know it can be hard to do, but you get used to doing it in time.
Leave it alone, what needs to be said has been said, let him live with it for awhile.
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People say things like this all the time in relationship. Honestly, I believe that when a person starts to question your feelings, they're really only asking that you're willing to show them. It's a test of love, and it's easier to beat it out when you're in love-- which it sounds to me that you are.
Your concern is genuine, and I doubt that one fight after a weekend vacation would really jeopardize a relationship that appears strong since it's been going for 2 years.
Let him cool off, and then explain to him that you do love him.. you love him enough to worry about the outcome of what happened. Should one suitcase throwing fight end 2 years?
Good luck, I hope I helped!
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Let things settle down. Like you said he is very upset and seems to want some time to think. Give him a couple of days and then try to talk to him. Explain how much he means to you and that it was in a fit of rage that you said that, but you were not kidding about the fact of him disrespecting your things, and ask him not to do it again. If worse comes to worse, show him the question, because it seems to say it all. If he rejects it, maybe it is time to move on.
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