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Family Problems/Raising Money
my mom doesnt want to pay for the big 8th grade trip at the end of the year thats going to be lots of fun, but she has already paid 100 dollars that cannot be retrieved again, but out of my money, since she was mad at me. like no matter what i do.. even when i try to improve my bad habits, she says shes satisfied but she is never satisfied because still today she is mad about the subject, because she says that i dont listen to what i have to say, and sometimes yeah i do talk back a lot which i guess i shouldn't do.. but sometimes like i dont want people to think the wrong idea of me.. so i feel that if i dont say anything back they just assume that i do what they're thinking? its basically a lose-lose situation. and i need the money by tomorrow for the 2nd half payment of the field trip, 158 dollars. how can i raise this sum of money in 1 day? or i can beg to my teacher to extend the day, so then how can i raise 158 dollars for the day after tomorrow? also how can i change how my mom views me? like because i dont know maybe its just something with the teenage years where some stuff has to go wrong.. the majority of my problems all revolve around me procastinating, and then not getting work done, missing the bus, etc. i've even wanted to see the school guidance person about ways to fix it, because every other advice people give me does not seem to work really. but for the past couple days i've been pretty focused. and i havent missed the bus since around the beginning of january. i even cleaned my room and make an extra effort to not leave a mess lying around, and stay on my mom's good side. i even get good grades but my mom looks beyond that. and im doing another fundraiser so i can go to japan this summer, to help out my parents who have to pay 5000 dollars for it, and im selling gum and chocolate. im trying really hard to not give in to my desires to end up eating all the candy and gum for myself, and ive only eaten one chocolate which my mom found out about, and the rest im selling. but my mom still doesnt see change in me.. it just feels hopeless.. i mean maybe i lost her trust because before i guess they always thought i was the perfect child, when my older sister was having some problems, and now its like reversed, even though nobody was really too perfect to begin with. my sis is in almost all honors classes in high school and gets mostly As. Im only in advanced math, i get awards for my art and etc, and get As and Bs. to some families that would be amazing, and when i say that to my mom she gets mad.. because i guess she and my dad have been through a whole lot so they want us to be perfect.. but its so hard. like many kids have problems with homework and stuff cause they dont get it.. for me, i usually get it, and my main problem is what i said before; procastination. i dont know why i do it.. its hard to explain it to people. and i feel really bad, and hate having to say to my teachers i dont have the homework in. my mom constantly says that every little thing like that counts, and i know it does, because i got a B instead of an A because of it last marking period in literacy, but so far this marking period ive missed no homework! well i know this is long but i really wanna fix my home problems and REALLY want to go to that trip!
14/f
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
If there is one thing that is wrong in the world is that there is no such thing as a perfect child. True, we can dream about being a perfect child, read about a perfect and so on but in reality, there is no such thing. Parents dream about having this child but what is perfect can come which a few downsides.
It's good that you've changed your act because it tells me that you're deadly serious about going on this trip and your mum needs to understand that. There is nothing worse than have a desire to go somewhere or want something and not get it, I've experianced that recently.
You need to ask her what else you need to do to win her trust back. And you've got all the right cards to play: you've tieded up your act, you're fund raising for your next trip to help your parents, you're doing so much better in school and not missing deadlines, you're not talking back as much as you did. All of this has to count for something (which your mum has rightly said), but what is that something?? That is what you've got to ask.
As for the money, if you've got some relatives near by, could you ask if you could borrow some money and you'll pay them back? If you do, then you MUST pay them back every dollar otherwise they won't trust you and you won't to be able to ask them for money again.
I hope this helped,
triquetra
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Awhh, Well sweetie what i can tell you for advice is that do you have an aunt or uncle any family member that will lend you the money for a while. or maybe i mean if you really wnt to go on that trip tell your mom she wont have to give you a birthday or like a christmas present or something. try babysitting especially if you want to save up for that trip this summer. talk even to your principle because i know for a fact if you are having money problems in a sence that they will go easy on you. like my aunt just had twins and my cousins cant get everything now especially for school trips so they had to go down little by little in payments. so really talk to the school in first hand and try to raise money by babysitting. and for the way your mother acts towards you just i know it hurts but just get detatched from her and try being more independent in that matter and if you dont want to do that try and see if maybe you do more chores and she see's you improving. i really hope i helped you :)
goodluck hun!
Chanel-Lynn
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