|
What can I do to convince my parents to move?
I'll try and keep it short and sweet.
I go to a public school in a town about 30 minutes away from where I live. My mom is a teacher there, which is why I'm allowed to go. Because of this it can be extremely difficult to have a life with friends out there. I no longer have friends in the town I live in, and only a small group of friends in a town over. My parents have been talking about moving for a while, and yet whenever I try to help they yell at me, and tell me they will deal with it.
Why don't they seem to want to move? What can I do to help them without them getting mad? I don't think it's a question of money. It's true the town over is expensive, but I've looked and there are affordable houses. Theres a lot of work to do before we sell our current house, but I'm completely willing to help them with every step of it. But I need their help first; I can't go rip out the rug in our basement and replace it myself, I can't gut the bathroom by myself. What should I do?
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
Plain and simple: It's their house, not yours.
They will decide where they want to live next.
They will decide what work to do in the current home.
I mean, it is home to you, but you have to remember its only home to you for so long- its home to them forever.
Take you/we out of the equation. Trust them when they say they will deal with it.
ygs-29/f
]
EDIT/
Seriously hun, whining and 'regretting' isn't going to help you here. Suddenly I'm not surprised your parents have become short tempered with you. It's not about if your request is 'reasonable' or not, it's about whether you are being a brat about or not. Your tone here is VERY self-involved.
It's okay that you diagree, but you can disagree and still be wrong.
Sometimes I wish I could read back to people what they write on this site when they are 25. I think a twenty-five year old you would be surprised at yourself.
It's isn't for you to decide what the family does, and just because they WANT something (like I want to go to Disneyland, and it would be good for me, and I could afford it and take the time off) doesn't mean that what you WANT is going to happen, right now, or ever. (I have better, and more important things to do, then go to Disneyland.)
Take a deep breath and be a teen for goodness sake. Let them be the adults. Yes, it's frustrating, but clearly it isn't going to change and your pressuring them is making matters worse, not better. So suck it up and find the silver lining. Or just be miserable. Moving is their choice. Being miserable or not is yours.
/EDIT
There probably isn't much you can do hun.
Although you are willing to help, this is really an 'adult' decision. I know, teens hate my guts when I say that, but it is.
Moving will change thier finacial plans for the next ten years. It sounds like it will require hiring people to work on the current home, perhaps getting the bank to aprrove that. It could change thier career planning. It could change when they retire, when they take vacations, how many cars they have... and so and so forth.
You simply can't help with those things.
All the stuff you can help with, the packing and organzing and housework and cooking and prep, all of that takes place AFTER they have made the decision.
Take a deep breath, and give them thier space. They clearly know what you would like, but I'm afriad moving isn't something an adult can really do just to 'help out' thier kid ;). Have some understanding and respect, and be ready to jump when they do ask for your help.
And perhaps, after you've backed off them a bit, you might ask them what they are 'thinking about', not what you can do, not what needs to happen and not when (those are stressful questions they might not have asnwers too) but just what is on thier minds.
]
More Questions: |