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Other guy.. I cant believe this is happenning
Im 14/f and I have a boyfriend. But the problem is im not really happy with my boyfriend and I think I understand why. When my boyfriend asked me out I didnt expect him to for another week and I was going to use that week to think of my decision, but my friend convinced him to ask me out earlier and I ended up saying yes because he was being really cute and sweet about it.
The other problem is I think I still like this one guy I have liked for a while. This guy however is one of my best friends, he tells me everything and it kills me when girls hurt him and he gets really upset, we have gotten into conversations where we would bring up the possibility of us dating, and after a few jokes we'd both always say we see eachother as such good friends that we can always joke around with and have fun with that we'd never date. Ive slept over at his house a few times but once again we are really good friends so that was why. About a week ago he told me that if I did ask him to this one formal (i told him i was thinking about it cause we were both dateless) that he wouldve definately said yes and for some reason that got me really mad cause I kind of blew my chance.
I dont understand why this is happening cause we are such good friends and he'd never be interested in me. Is there anyway I can convince myself to get over the other guy and try to learn to be happier with my boyfriend?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I can't promise that things will work out with your friend, but it sounds to me like you both like each other. If he does like you, ovbiously you wouldn't feel like he does right now because your in a relationship and he, as a really good friend, dosn't want to mess that up for you.
BUT REGARDLESS OF HIM
If you don't feel like you like your boyfriend in that way...that probably won't change and you really need to rethink that relationship. It's not fair to him not to.
good luck!
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You could learn to tolerate someone, or like someone as a friend, that you have no feelings for. But if you've just started a relationship with someone you have no feelings for, you can't force yourself to like them or love them, at least not in the romantic sense.
From reading this, you don't seem to have any feelings for your boyfriend. You could continue to try to make the relationship work for the sake of not letting him down or whatnot, but really, what would be the point? If you don't like your boyfriend and pretend to or force yourself to, that's not a real relationship. Yes, he would probably be hurt if you you told him you never liked him in the first place, or if you broke it off with him, but it's a lot better in the long run for both you and him to call it off. Be nice about it. You can tell him the truth. Something like "I'm not sure we should be together anymore. To be honest, I wasn't sure about going out with you in the first place, but you were so cute and sweet about asking me out that I didn't want you to feel bad" or something along those lines. Take note of this in the future, too: it doesn't matter how nice or cute a guy is, or even how much he likes you - if you don't have feelings for him, that's okay. Really. You should only be convinced to go out with someone if you genuinely like that person; otherwise things just get complicated. As you are finding out, you can't please all the guys that like you at once. So just do what's comfortable for you, date who you want to date, and be in only the relationships that you want to be in.
Hmm I didn't answer the second part of your confusion since it seemed sortof obvious. This guy friend of yours, the one that would never like you because you're friends... he seems to be developing a crush on you of some sort =]. Be honest with your boyfriend, and you'll have a lot more options in what you do about this new (or not so new) development. (oh come on, what were you expecting me to say, force yourself to be with someone you don't particularly like in that way for the rest of your life? That, my dear, is why there are few arranged marriages).
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this is over my head...but i think your guyfriend likes you. sounds like it.
he might be hiding it because he thinks you dont feel the same way because yall are too good of friends. as the whole bf thing? i dont think its too possible. maybe take a little break? idk.
hope everything works out! :)
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Decied about whom you feel the most about. Sit down and see whom you think about the most. There really is no way you can convince yourself about your friend because your feelings for him will grow stronger.
If you think about your friend more nad have stronger feelings for him, then you should go out with him. There is no point going out with a guy when your thoughts are on another.
If you can see a future with your friend, then take it up and go out with him and see how that goes, then decide about your boyfriend. This isn't an affair, it's just so you can sort out your feelings for the two of them.
I hope this helped,
triquetra
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