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My MOM...
....is pissing me off. All. The. Time.
I do not know what to do about my mom. Generally speaking, she can never be happy with me or anyone else; picking and picking at sore scars is what she does best (she's weak, what can I say).
To be more specific, we fight all the time, and it sounds outlandish, but it's almost never my fault. She fights with anyone and everyone. Simple as that.
Today she called FOUR times to yell at me about the same thing. FOUR times. I did not want to go to HER friend's house for lunch, I had other things to do. She yelled at me about it, and changed the topic to something that had nothing to do with it at all, only to YELL again (and feel good). She's off the wall, everyone knows it.
I tell myself to calm down and ignore her ,but it's so hard. What's the best way to avoid her, without getting worked up over her craziness and yelling? Anyone in a similar situation? Thank you
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
You already know the answer. The best way to avoid her and ignore her...things you mentioned, is just to do it consistently. The right thing is not usually the easy thing, is it? She probably knows on some level how bizarre she is, but it is easier to do the same old thing, than to change. Do you want to be like her? Right now she has you sucked into a pattern with her and you are an adult now and able to remove yourself, but the child in you does not know how. This is growing up. I have homework for you and it will be life changing...promise. Read TOXIC PARENTS and get back to me.
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Deja vu? My mom is the same exact way (or was). You want to know how I finally fixed her ass? One day, I called her and told her that my dad and I got into it. She told me well your going to be pissed off at me too then. She had told my brother something I told her and asked her not to say anything. So, I finally said, "ya know what, I'm done with this family. I'm sick of this shit." I didn't talk to her for a week. Now, she has totally given me my space and stops being so judgmental of me. So, here is my suggestion to you. You can either a) get angry, yell at her, tell her to mind her own business, back off, and don't talk to her for a few days. or b) you can sit down and talk to her and tell her that although her advice is appreciated when you ask for it, but you need room to become your own person. If she doesn't like it, revert back to a! Good Luck!!
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Lol, I'm glad I read the additional info or it would've been totally hard to resist calling you a brat. You're 23. You're old enough to make decisions for yourself, especially if you don't live with your parents anymore.
My advice to you would be to hit the ignore button on your cell phone if you don't want to talk to her. Although it would be very considerate of you to go along with what she says because of the fact that she IS your mother, but you are entitled to your own life.
The best thing you can do [as hard as it is] is just count to ten and deal with it, and leave as soon as possible or avoid or ignore her. Some people on here will probably tell you that you should try talking to her about it, but chances are that you've either tried that road already or that would only make the condition worse.
Sorry, hun.
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