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Are they right? Or am I?
I'm 16 and a girl. I live on a ranch. I have three older brothers and my dad who worked on the ranch. My oldest brother doesn't work anymore because he lives in a different town. My middle brother still works and my youngest older brother works on the ranch. Well I don't work on the ranch unless they ask me too and I do whatever they need me too. They don't ask me often, but when they do I do what needs to be done. I usually just stay in the house and do house chores. Well my youngest older brother (Barry) is really rude to me. He always tells me how lazy I am. He says I'm a spoiled brat (which I'm not. I work for a lot of things I have). He has called me a bitch many times. He has hurt me physically in the past and continues to damper my confidence. My parents worship him and anything he says they back him up. It is really starting to take a toll on me. I cry everyday hoping things will get better, but they just get worse. Am I wrong to think this is abuse? What do I need to do?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
No, you say you work for everything you have, so it is clear they are being unfair. If they think you're worthless than that makes them no better. Calling their own family member worthless is extremely disrespectful. You need to stand your ground in a polite way, prooving to them that you are not worthless and that you won't take that treatment from them. By doing this, you'd show them that you're all grown up and play an important part in your family. Don't let anyone tell you that you're worthless, cause if you were, you wouldn't exist. Tell your brother that you just want to get along with him and that you're tired of fighting all the time. Fighting is worthless, but you aren't. Proove that to your family( you shouldn't have to)but do what you can to make them see, that you have feelings and they aren't worthless!
If this was any help at all then great!If you need anymore help than message me, cause I know where you're comming from.
<Guidance Girl>
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I don't think you are wrong to think it is abuse. It can be taken in many ways. Emotionally, physically, and mentally. Family should be about love, support and honesty. They just need to understand that you suceed and are responsible. Maybe your brother is just jealous and loves the attention spot light. But he has to learn it wont always be him that is right and the most important. He has a lot of maturing to do and your parents need some parenting skills. They need to listen to everyone and know that not the same person is right all the time. I say just stick through stay strong and don't give up. You are a confident woman and nothing as little as that can bring you down.
ps-learn karate or self-defense haha. might come in handy.
Good Luck
Corbie-Leigh♀
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It sounds like your brother is very jealous of you, and probably has been for a long time. Think about it: before you were born, he was the baby of the family... the cute little one who was pampered and got all the attention. Then YOU came along, and that attention was diverted to you. And not only were you the new baby, but you were a GIRL... a precious little fragile angel who was probably treated much differently than her brothers.
And even if you're not the least bit spoiled, in HIS eyes, it seems that you get special treatment. You aren't required to do the hard physical labor; while he's out toiling on the ranch, you "get" to stay inside and do the "easy" chores. [And I'm not saying your jobs are easy, because trust me, I know they aren't... but that's probably the way HE imagines it.] Also, as a girl, you have a different relationship with your parents than he and your other brothers have, and he might be a little jealous of that special bond.
Not that any of this makes his behavior right. It definitely doesn't. I'm just saying that this may be the reason he acts that way towards you.
What can you do about it? Unfortunately, probably not much. He's going to have to grow up on his own and get over this. If you fight back and give in to his taunts, it will only convince him that he's right, that you are a spoiled brat. So just try to keep your cool and remind yourself that he probably won't be a jerk forever. At some point he will mature and come to value his relationship with his sister.
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This could really hurt you now and in the long run. Its not right for your parents to take his side in everything. You need to make your point across someway . Wether its screamin on the top of your lung , whatever works for you . Your not going to be happy where your at now . Talk to someone else . Maybe another adult .
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If he is really abusing you and your parents wont help get help from someone else you trust like a teacher or call someone who can help. he has no right to hurt you or ruin your life
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