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Apparently I've changed
Hey everyone. First, I'd like to apoligize in advanced if this is long. But this is something that has been bothering me for a while. So this year, I've noticed a change in me. I can't exactly pin point it. I seem to have a lot more confidence, my styles switches slightly, and I'm making lots of new friends. All of these sound good right? Well according to a 'friend' of mine, I appear to think I'm better then everyone else which isn't the case AT ALL. I don't like conceited people and I know I have nothing to feel superior about. The problem is, my idea of right and wrong has kind of switched and all though I'm still a good kid (I don't smoke or do drugs, or steal) things that used to make me feel guilty, don't bother me anymore. I don't have as much of a problem lying to my parents (we don't seem to get along that well anymore) and I hang around some kids that do bad things, even though I don't. I've noticed that one of my friends and I have grown a lot closer, but me and some of my old friends have started drifting apart. I don't really know who I am anymore and that scares me because I like to be in total control of things. I don't really have a specific question, I'd just like some assurance from people who have experienced things like this, and maybe some advice to help me stay grounded, and figure out who I am. Thanks to anyone who took the time to read/answer this! ♥
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
Everyone changes. Often times these changes coincide with major life changes.
Going from 5th to 6th grade is common, as is going from 8th to 9th. These are times when you are going into a new atmosphere, new places, and they coincide with general changes in maturity.
Its going to happen to you again at 18, and probably again at 22. I'm past 22, and I am radically different from how I was at 18, which was radically different from how I was at 14. I like most of the changes, Ive grown and matured as a person.
You will probably go through the same things.
Lying to your parents is also normal. Parents are hard wired to think about you as a child. It makes them continually try to protect you, even as you become an adult. And at the same time, as you grow you will naturally separate from your parents and try to differ from them.
Its part of being human. I mean, imagine what the world would be like if parents and kids got along perfectly and everyone lived at home until they were married.
The same happens with friends. As you change, your friends do too. People you used to have lots in common with you dont any more. This is going to especially begin to matter as at 14 you are beginning to think about life, about the world, and to form you own opinions on life and how things do and should work. Often times these differences in how we see the world will bring us closer or separate us from those we cared about.
My best advice, is don't resist change. Its going to happen, and theres nothing you can do to stop it. Just try to stay focused on remaining a good person, keeping your morals in tact. You arent going to figure out who you are entirely for a long time, either. So don't spend too much time worrying about it. At 14 by the time you figure out who you are you will be 15, and you will be different. At 15 by the time you figure it out you will be 17. You don't really start catching up (at least from my experience) until past high school. Changes become slower and more gradual and more subtle as you get older.
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really, you're a typical teenager. You're growing up.
I'm fifteen, so obviously not that much older then you, but the same type of switch happened with me, and I got that reaction from a few of my friends too. You actually do sound a lot like me.
Really, if you are happier this way, then just enjoy it. You are only young once, as cliche as that is.
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so I've noticed this in myself this year, your probabyl drifting from your old friends because you've changed and grown up in a way, but they haven't. your not conceited, you just have self confidence. Just dont care what people think about you, and be yourself, and have fun. Just dont be mean to your old friends, cause that gets you no where. so basically have fun, but dont get into trouble like your new friends
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