Question Posted Wednesday November 14 2007, 7:37 pm
15/f
ok i kinda like my boyfriend best friend and one night i had called him and we was talking for a while then our conversation got deep and we started talking about sex and what will happen if he comes see me cuz hes coming down here for christmas im very interested in him b/c hes different but i love my boifriend and i dont want to cheat so do you have any ideas on how to stop liking my boifriend best friend thanx
[ Answer this question ] Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category? Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life? Hannahxo answered Friday November 16 2007, 11:47 pm: No one who "loves" their boyfriend has the desire to have sex with another guy, let alone talk about it. It doesn't sound like you are truly commited to your boyfriend & that's not fair to him. Would you want your boyfriend to do the very things you're doing to him right now? How would you like it if he was thinking about having sex with your best friend? I mean, do you have any respect for him, for his feelings or for yourself? If you feel like you'd rather be with his best friend, then you need to be honest NOW. I can tell you right now - this whole situation isn't going to be pretty considering they are "best friends." (No friend agrees to have sex with their best friend's girlfriend.) But the only thing you can do is be honest from the start. [ Hannahxo's advice column | Ask Hannahxo A Question ]
thelaura answered Friday November 16 2007, 8:52 am: The most obvious thing would be to NOT contact his best friend in any way, shape, or form. Don't be tempted. Think about how you would feel if you found out your boyfriend has been having sneaky calls and initiated cheating.
Just don't do it. It's that simple. People DO have control over their actions.
Just think about what you're doing. You can't "love" him if you're interested in cheating with someone else. [ thelaura's advice column | Ask thelaura A Question ]
Jeanne answered Friday November 16 2007, 12:29 am: Well, you can't always control the way you feel... but you can definitely control the way you act. Just because you're attracted to someone, and have a chance to mess around with them, doesn't mean you have to actually do it.
Next time this guy starts talking like that, tell him, "Ya know, I'm feeling kinda guilty talking to you about this because I really like/love my boyfriend. So let's just not talk about this anymore." And then, when he comes down there, don't let yourself get into a situation where you might be tempted to do something you'll regret. Avoid being around him if neccessary, and don't let yourself be alone with him.
It's really good to learn this kind of self control, because this kind of thing will probably happen to you many more times throughout your life. Even when you're married! The truth is, being in love with someone doesn't stop you from being attracted to someone else. There will probably be many times when you'll have a chance to cheat. If you can be strong and resist the tempation, you'll feel so much better about yourself! [ Jeanne's advice column | Ask Jeanne A Question ]
Razhie answered Thursday November 15 2007, 10:42 pm: Stop talking to him.
If you keep talking, you are probably going to cheat. Your boyfriend might even think you already have if he found out about your phone calls.
So don't talk him. At all. Don't invite him to visit. You may still like him, but at least neither of you can do anything dumb that way. [ Razhie's advice column | Ask Razhie A Question ]
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