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This is the hardest thing that i have ever been through.
OK..
So i've had Sex a few years ago and i guess i'm under age too and none of my friends know... infact NO ONE knows.
The thing is this guy [Sam] at school asked me out and i said yes [i have been out with him before] and it was going well until today at break and i got told by my best friend [that has every lesson with him] that he was gona dump me for this college girl who is really pretty and later that i found out that she has had sex. Now Sam is the knid of guy that would do anything to have a girlfriend who likes action or gives action [e.g sex] so i think that he was gona dump me for someone who has had sex. I dumped him then in the next lesson that i had with him because i didn't want him to dump me. So now i don't know whether i should tell him that i've had sex or just leave it...
But then alot will spill out into the year at school and i will have been the first to have sex... and i'm not poular..
Please help me. I have no idea what to do and i'm just really agry, upset and worried about what i do or don't say...
I'm also sorry that it is long.. :S
Thankyou all in advance. X
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any guy that would go out witha girl who only gives him action is a jerk. thats all i gotta say to that one
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You don't need a guy like that. I don't see why you need to tell him you had sex. It could backfire on you. He could want you back again just for sex & bother you about it, then/or he could tell everyone that because you dumped him or make rumors about how he had sex with you. Honestly? You are probably not the first one to have sex. There's many people who keep it as a secret because it's not something you want to get around. Back when i went to middle school, I didn't hear anything about nonvirgins until a few years into high school, then all these secrets came out from back then. Most people can't handle rumors and people talking badly about them. So just leave it since most people aren't mature enough to handle that information. Besides you have nothing to prove. He could have stayed with you and waited, but he didn't. now isn't the right time to tell, maybe years later if you want. But I don't think you should tell and get very unwanted attention. If it gets out from HIM, you will have guys wanting to be with you.. for the wrong reason and the next thing you know, people are saying you have AIDS because you didn't give in. That's why you shouldn't say anything. He's not worth it.
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I just want you to know that if he is going to do this to you then you dont need him seriously. If nobody knows about you having sex then you dont have to tell them if you dont want to. But if he doesnt already know and he goes around telling everyone about other things then you really dont want to because then the whole school will know and that would definately ruin your life and hurt you really bad. If he wants you only for sex then he doesnt respect you and you deserve much better.
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Talk to Sam if you still like him. Communication is key in a relationship. It's entirely possible that he never wanted to dump you in the first place. Telling him you aren't a virgin is entirely up to you, but will probably open up a whole new door for you two in whatever relationship you have, and I can't tell you wether or not you are ready for that. Ask whomever you tell to keep the fact that you aren't a virgin to themselves. It's no one else's business but you- popular or not.
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