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Mind torture.
I can't handle this. My boyfriend of 7 months and I broke up a few weeks ago. Since the day we called it quits, I haven't been able to sleep normally or function in school. I'm constantly thinking about him or getting jealous over every girl he hugs. Its not that I even have feelings for him, its that I hate that he's happy and I'm not. I get headaches so much and I'm constantly battling with myself to stop thinking about him. I try to do things to fake happy to rub in his face, or to make him jealous, and nothing works. How do I get my life back and just forget about him?
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You, my friend, are a victim of emotional inertia. You got comfortable in your relationship. Now he's moving on, you realize you have to get moving, and resent him for making you get up, change and move on. Stop obsessing over him - focus on yourself. That's the only way you'll get through this.
For the rest of your life, you'll be making friends, losing friends, moving on and making new ones. It's part of that thing Disney called "The circle of life." Some people break up, some people move, some die, and others just fade away. Sucks, but that's the way it works.
When I lost one boyfriend, I couldn't eat/sleep/function. I didn't care about anything anymore. I didn't want to die, but I didn't want to live. Then my girlfriend asked me, what takes more courage - to push aside the idiots who've missed out on what you have to offer, and go out to live up to your full potential so the world can see what he lost; or to sit in a corner and blame him for every future failure, loss and miserable thing that will ever happen to you? I decided then and there that I wouldn't let anyone get between me and my happy future. Life is too short to allow someone else to prevent you from achieving and growing.
Define what it is you loved and lost with that boyfriend. Then define all the dealbreakers - things about him that annoyed you, made you sad, things you wanted to change, things that hurt you. Ask yourself would you rather live with those dealbreakers, or find someone else who excels in those areas?
Don't forget about him - he made your life special in unique ways. Appreciate him for that, but remind yourself about the ways he fell short, so you can start looking for someone better suited to you in the long run.
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you have to give it some time
its normal for you to get mad
i would too
just be happy not for him
but for yourself. when your around him go hang out with somone else
or be happy walk with your friends and laugh get your mind off of him and when you see him pretend you cant
i hope this workss
just try it
^IICEICEEBABY^
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well, the first step is to face the truth about your feelings for him. if it is bothering you so much and you get jelious and he is always on your mind, then the truth is that you do still have feelings for him. confront those feelings. be aware of what those feelings are. once you have done that, decide if you still want him back or not. if you do, then talk to him about it. try to get through it. if you decide you don't want him back, but you don't want anyone else to have him either, then my advice to you is to try and put him past you. if you still have feelings for him, it'll be hard not to think about him. the best way to stop thinking about him, is don't talk about him, don't talk to him, and try to move on. don't try to pretend you are happy if you are really not, because you won't be able to find happiness by pretending. and don't try to make him jelious, because that is just playing games, and it will end up heurting you in the end. so, just confront your feelings, talk to him about it if you think it'll help, and then just let the healing process begin. i hope i helped. remember to keep smiling.
nina :)
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