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Kissing
16/f
I've only really made out alot and stuff with one boy, pathetic..I know. Well, now we've been broken up for about 1 and half years and I got a new boyfriend. He wants me to kiss him and stuff but I told him that I'm not ready for that yet. I'm absolutly terrified of kissing him. I'm even scared of giving him a little peck. I know that I'm scared for two reasons:
#1 I'm afraid that by kissing him our realationship will get really serious and I know from past experiences that as soon the realationship gets serious I get freaked and dump him.
#2 I'm sooo scared that I'm a really bad kisser. My current boyfriend has had a ton of experience and I'm afraid I won't meet up to his standards.
How can I overcome this fear?!
Sorry that this is so long!
Thanks for your help
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"love finds those who take their time in searching." that is a quote that i try to live by. fist of all. i know excacly what you are going through. i have gone through the same thing. it is not uncommon to put your gaurd up after being hurt. in fact, by not kissing your new boyfriend right away, you are stating that you have will power. if this guy was smart, he would understand were you are comming from. if he does not, then he isn't worth it. you need to find someone who understands your pain and your concern. just tell him, you have been hurt before. you want to take things very slow, or else you might be scared off. take the time and get to know him. let him be aware of how you feel. remember to let your gaurd down just a little, but keep it up enough to know when something is wrong. and always keep on smiling.
nina :)
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Talk to him.
Seriously. I know that sounds even MORE scarry, but it is the best way to reduce your fear.
Just tell him what you told us. That you are afriad of getting too serious and freaking out, and you are afriad that you are a bad kisser.
If he is a good guy, he will reasure you, and it will help him understand and deal with your behavoir if he knows what feelings are motivating you. Telling him doesn't mean you have to change what you are doing, it just means he'll know.
Keep in mind that kissing a new person for the first time is ALWAYS a bit awkward. Everybody has thier own style, it takes a bit to be confident and understand eachother. I've been making out with people for almost ten years now, and every once and a while I miss where I was aiming, our teeth knock a little bit, our noses bump... whatever! Those things happen and don't make you a bad kisser. They make you human.
If you are nervous, just follow your partners lead and let them control the kiss untill you get a better feel for thier style.
It's really not as big a deal as your mind has made it out to be. When you are ready, just take a deep breath, and let it happen.
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tell him exactly how u feel if he really wants to make out and stuff he'll show u. he'll probably show u some tricks hehe. hope i helped : ]
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