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Transformation.
I'm at a tough point in my life. Not majorly, but I could use some guidance. For so long I've been limiting myself...I haven't been being myself and during many situations I don't know who it is I am. Like last night: I had a sleepover with two girls who are very genuine, fun people and they were dancing and I made an attempt to join in, but physically my body refuses to be in motion. Not because I'm afraid of what they'll think when I begin to dance, but because I'm so critical of myself. What could be done about this? Also, when I'm very relaxed, my personality is at it's finest, so what are some methods of getting relaxed often, without the use of drugs? Thanks!
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Believe me if your friends are bopping around to tunes in your room in their pajamas or underwear and having a good time they aren't about to judge you if you joined in.
Why? Well, for one thing what they're doing is pretty goofy and looks silly or even if they can dance they're only interested in having fun. They're probably wondering "She must think we look stupid or why won't she join us?
Believe me they're probably more concerned with how they think they look to you rather than with what you are doing whether you stink at dancing or not. Next time, get in there and just do something, anything without thinking about it. If they laugh, laugh with 'em.
The reason you cannot seem to move naturally is that you have allowed fear to paralyse you. Your body is too darn tense and locked up as a result. You don't have to be the best dancer or a dancer period so don't get down on yourself. If you want to dance just try.
Better yet have them teach you what they know so you'll feel better about it and yourself. If they're genuine people you ought to explain your fears to them as they can get you to relax more.
I think it's in your best interest to hire a psychiatrist or psychologist that deals only with adolescents and talk about your fears and how they prevent you from enjoying yourself. You need to really get to the heart f why you are so self-critical and paralysed with fear of things.
As far as drugs go that's up to your doctor or them. You might benefit from a prescription medication for anxiety and fear but that's up to the professionals to determine.
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eee i had the same thing. I just couldn't dance in front of my friends. I mean i had never really danced before, and they were such good dancers. And so when i would dance i just couldn't get my body to move right [also because i was critical] So what i did was turn up some music when i was home alone and just dance. No ones there to watch you. Just look in the mirror and see which way your body moves best. I know that this seems silly but once you are comfortable dancing by yourself, you'll be even more comfortable dancing in front of people. You just gotta go with the flow of the music. I've also watched my friends danced and picked up some stuff from them.
Hmm, getting relaxed. Well normally to relax myself, i just say WHATEVER to everything. I try not to think too much into things, like what if i'm weird. what if i can't be myself, what if i'm left out. I find when you start thinking about all the what ifs you get even more self concious and quiet. And all of that prevents you from being relaxed and showing your true personality. You just gotta be out there, show who you are. People will most likely like you even better. I always feel people can detect when someones uncomfortable or not showing who they really are.
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