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first time
16/f, virgin.
I am going to be having sex soon and the guy I'm with is REALLY experienced... and I'm obviously not, I mean, since I'm a virgin. The farthest I've gone was being fingered.
Ok so he doesn't know I'm a virgin. While we're doing it will everything just come naturally for me? Is that how it is for most people? What should i do besides just lie there taking it? Does it typically hurt the first time?
ANY advice to help make this less stressful for me is appreciated.
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Sex the first time is very overwhelming, but it will go away the more you do it. Be sure you want to loose your virginity to this guy and be sure you really love him. Your not a virgin forever...
Tell the guy that you are a virgin and I'm sure he will understand. Just talk to him about it becuase you want your first time to be pleasureable. If you go your own pace, things should fall into place. It might not come normal but not everything is perfect. You don't have to worry about making a fool of yourself because you won't. For me, I was very nervous but I told him everything and he understood and everything was fine. When you take it, women normally make sounds and guys love that. However, it's your first time, you can just be quiet. It doesn't 'typcially' hurt the first time, it depends. If you broke the hymen, it normally will not hurt. it takes time to make it feel comfortable so there's a possibilty it will hurt.
GO YOUR OWN PACE.
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First, Im going to assume that this is a made decision, that you are fine with it, and as mentally prepared as you are going to be, and not unsure.
Im also assuming this is a nice committed relationship that isnt going to end any time soon.
Make him wear a condom.
What was that?
Oh yeah.
Make him wear a condom.
Thats just in case he tries to talk you into it otherwise. Even if you are on birth control, make him wear a condom. If hes sleeping with a 16 year old then hes immature enough to be willing to hide/lie about STDs. I can say that for a fact considering a friend of mine recently had alot of trouble in his life because he was 23 and lying about herpes he had had since HE was 16.
Anyway. Your dilemma.
A few tips.
1) Sex is a skill. This means that you must accept the fact that you wont know what you're doing at first and will learn. Be willing to take suggestions.
2) Ask questions. Ask him what he'd like you to do. If you dont know how to do it ask for suggestions. Try things out. Experiment. Communication leads to better sex, later.
3) Take an active interest. The fact that you havent had sex before should not make you freeze in place. Run your hands over his arms, shoulders, chest, neck, face, wherever you feel like touching. Pull him down for a kiss. Encourage him.
4) Dont be afraid of alkward elbows and clumsy clothes. Sex doesnt have to have a "maintained mood". Its ok to bonk heads and laugh about it. It happens to us all. And goofy sex can be fun too.
5) Information is fun. So is reading. Google can lead you to a wonderland of more specific technical instructions.
6) Key point. Sexiness. Most young women do not feel "sexy" often. And most young men are too inexperienced with the relationship side of sex to know how to reinforce a woman's ego and draw out her playful side.
So you kinda get stuck on your own on this one.
Sex is alot about attitude. The state of mind you enter it with can completely change the experience.
Following that, your attitude can vastly affect how things go. When one of you is obviously turned on, it will turn the other one on. Passions build. Things get more heated. Or one of you can be sweet, and it provokes that in your partner, and theres lots of kissing and rubbing and whispering "I love you" in each other's ears.
Realize that you have the power to control this. If you act like a sex kitten, are seductive, he will be seduced. If you feel sexy, and show him that he turns you on, he will be turned on in turn.
7) Dont be afraid to make noises. Just dont wake the neighbors. Aural feedback, whether words or just sighs and moans, encourage him and let him know when hes doing something right.
8) Dont be afraid to say no instantly if you arent sure of something. Better to say no now and figure it out later than to say yes and regret it. You can always change a no to a yes later.
Edit
9) The female orgasm. It took my girlfriend nearly a year of regular sex before we worked out the kinks enough for her to climax regularly and with ease. It took time for her to be relaxed enough, and for us to work out the specific motions and position required, etc. It turned out she can only come from one position.
So, if it doesnt happen, dont be surprised, and dont freak out. If it does, enjoy it.
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well i think you should tell him that you're a virgin. and then yeah if he still does it with you, it will be better because you know that youve told him. yeah it will probabaly orgasm normally. it might hurt because its you're first time, but then again you have been fingered before so im not sure...
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Hi there, If this is really what you want then you should tell him that you are a virgin. That way he should be gentle with you and take his time. You should be relaxed, have lots of foreplay that should make it easier. It may hurt a little. It will come naturally to you. I remember my first time what a disaster as it was his first time too so we did'nt have a clue what we were doing!! Please be carefull use condoms at all times, be 100% sure it's what you want.
Enjoy it as you will always remember your first time.
good luck let me know how you get on.
P.S your the first one I've answered too!!
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