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okay. well me and my boyfriend have been going out for almost 3 monthes now. and i kinfof want to do more than makeout but imm scared if i talk to him about it seriously he'll think im a slut and break up with me. and if i say it jokingly he obviously wont take it seriously. helpp.
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Basically, you have to also look for it in body language too. I am not suggesting you take charge of the action without getting some feedback before hand. If he's always going to do the same things (such as making out and other types of stuff) he could still have a slight problem with going further right now anyway (considering the length of the relationship, but that's just me anyway). It's important to communicate stuff like this anyhow because of the fact that this type of stuff can make or break relationships (the fact that you have to be on the same "mindset" in terms of needs and wants).
Body language and knowing the person can also determine if he already is what they call a "freak on a leash". Basically, has he tried to do anythin g more 'adventurous' in terms of the making out sessions? The problem with the situation is that it's VERY EASY to seem to come on strong if you suggest during some makeout session that you throw it out there (or ask him anything) if he would like to do something more. That would be a simple, but complicated thing to do, and even yourself said you didn't want to come off as a 'slut' (aka coming on too strong). But, if no option was left to do and you had to ask him, you should ask him about perhaps doing more, and make it seem that you're not the one directly asking for it, but seeing if he wanted to do more (also making sure nothing is giving away that you secretly want more).
Before you do anything (like remotely asking about it and such) though, you should make sure that the body signals he's giving you and that you know him and his personality.
Also, one last thing to add, if you did ask him 'jokingly' and he completely blew if off and also kinda looked taken aback from it, chances are it might just be a little more time before things can progress on (most guys have different 'time periods' or limits before you can do certain stuff with them/to them {and you thought only females had this...=p}).
I know it didn't exactly say how to ask him, but I hope the information somehow helped you.
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i say you tell him that u are ready to take your relationship to the next level. if he really likes you then he wont think that you are a slut. i bet he was thinking the same thing but is afraid you would be mad if he says he wants to do more. tell him seriously. hope it works out.
SAM
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Why would you want to do more with someone who you don't think is mature enough to handle talking about it? If he's going to think you're a slut because you're into him enough to want to take things to the next level or if he thinks you're not serious because you make a joke to decrease a bit of your nervousness about the situation, this guy isn't worth giving yourself to.
If I were you, I would think long and hard about going through with this because once you do it you can't undo it. Either your perception of him is off or he's got some growing up to do; either way - I think it suggests that you should wait a while. Tell him how you're feeling (be open and honest about it) and see how he reacts. Sex is a big deal and you should be wise about it.
Use your head and don't settle for anything less than the absolute best.
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Just talk to him. You two have been going out for 3 months. He is not going to think you're a slut. Honestly, just be like sit him down and talk to him about it. If you're inder 13 though, people would consider you a slut. So, do what'd you like to and make sure you don't force him.
If you need anymore help and if you need to know how to do these things go to www.sextutor.com
Hope I helped & Good Luck!
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Thanks for asking to my inbox- despite the fact that I'm bemused that you're asking ME of all people...
Anyway.. relationships are based on a few things: trust and communication. If you can't tell him that you want to do more- how will he know? I'm almost positive he can't read minds. Should you ever want something in a relationship- the only way you're going to get it is to tell your boyfriend or girlfriend what you want. They won't just assume you're wanting something if you don't say it.
If he thinks you're a slut for asking- he isn't right for you.
--Jack
(15/m)
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