|
sex
i'm a 15 year old girl and i've recently had sex. i still care about the boy i did it with. in fact i think i love him. he's still there for me, all sex has done is make us closer than ever, but it's driving me nuts cause i can;t tell my mom. i want to, we used to be really close, and this is a huge thing, but she would be furious, and i don't think i'd ever see my boyfriend again and i couldn't live with that. what do i do?
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Sexual Health and Reproduction category?
Maybe give some free advice about: General Sex Questions?
You can always tell your parents about anything including sexual activity. They might not be happy about it at first but most parents would rather be in the know than have their teens sneaking around and or getting pregnant accidentally.
This way she will be in the know and can ensure you get on a good form of birth control plus condoms to be safe. She would be happier knowing this and getting you birth control and keeping you safe than you possibly becoming pregnant.
As hard as it may be to tell her you should. That's why your gut is nagging you about this. You have to remember that she was your age once and likely had sex at your age or a bit older. She has a lot of wisdom she can impart to keep you safe and from making blunders.
Talk to her and tell her this and that you want to work on your relationship as you want to be close like you were when you were younger and not be holding on to secrets.
]
That is a tough situation honey!
It is great that you want to share things with your Mum at this age - most teenagers want to hide everything. Looks to me like you are streets ahead in realising that your Mum is in fact "a best friend".
Anyway, the thing to remember here is that although her initial reaction may be anger you have to understand that this is (1) her reaction to realising that her little girl is growing up; and (2) the maternal instinct kicking in - she only wants to protect you from getting hurt.
If you have never spoken with her about sex then I would suggest sounding her out by asking a few simple questions about sex. That way you can gauge her reaction.
In all honesty, if it is upsetting you so much then you should probably just tell her and see what happens. There may be a firework show however she will calm down and ultimately, no matter what, she will still love you!!!
Once she calms down then you will be able to talk to her more openly and tell her that you felt that you were ready and wanted to tell her so that there were no secrets between you.
I would like to stress however that it is extremely important that you use contraception whenever you have sex, be it penetrative or oral. Perhaps this is something that your Mum could help you out with? At least that way she will know that you are safe!
Hope this helps.
]
Well, you say that you and your mother use to be really close, why aren't you still close?....
I think around those adolescence years, parents and teenagers disagree on alot of things. It's normal. Some parents are protective and that tends to make them worry. And some parents are over-protective, and they just worry all the time. Here's your part, you have to figure out which category your mother fits under. I'm not saying that if she's over-protective don't tell her because she'll freak, you would just have to go about the situation a little diffrently opposed to her being protective.
It really sounds like you want that special bond back with your mother. One thing i will never do is to tell someone to lie, as long as your not lying to her then i think it's okay that you keep it from her. But on the other hand, if you do tell her she would feel as if you trust her and being that this is a huge topic i think it would bring you two even closer together.
If she doesn't suspect that your doing anything then she may be surprised, and shocked, and possibly get upset. But if she does suspect that you have been having sex then she may handle the situation a little better because it's kind of like she already knew she just had no proof.
Another thing, no matter whether your mom is protective or over-protective, there going to ask have you used a condom. (I hope you did) I'm not saying that being pregnant at 15 is a bad thing, it's just something you shoudn't consider until you can provide for yourself and your baby.
Speaking from an experienced point of view (and yes i was pregnant at the age of 14) I think you should tell her that you have had sex, and whether or not you have been using protection.
Let me know how it goes.
(: *Smilez Til Later* :)
]
More Questions: |