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No longer friends?
I'm 16/f, used to be bestfriends with a 16/m. We were extremely close, the best of friends, we no longer are. We've grown apart due to random fights, and idk why. But anyway, I cry all the time over him. It's like mourning a loss, but really it's just a friendship. Basically, I've tried since February (when we were no longer best friends) to maintain a good friendship with him, and it's real hard.
I've come to the conclusion that continuing being his friend is the wrong choice. He's the only person that makes me cry, I always feel like I'm never good enough for him, I'm tired of being hurt. Would you say cutting all contact with him, not seeing him, etc, would help me forget about him & allow me to no longer be his friend?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
In my opinion, you`re better off without him.
Alright, make two lists.
One of all the good things about him, one of all the bad. Whichever one is bigger, well, there`s your answer.
If there`s more bad things, don`t just suddenly start entirely ignoring him. He`ll probably freak out if ya`ll are still friends. Just gradually stop calling him, IMing him, etc. If he calls, explain the situation to your family & tell them not to pick up. Also, block his number from your cell phone if you need to. Whatever you do, try not to talk bad about him, somehow -- they always find out. Don`t start a fight either to end the friendship, just gradually break away. It`s hard, I know, but it`ll get easier after a while. =]
Good luck!
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hey
noo don't cut all contact with him! what if he one day does want to be friends? i would say if he says "hey what's up" don't ignore him. you may need him one day. but, like the person under me said, i would see where the relationship going, always being open to whatever happens because things can change.
also, was this REALLY random? i mean, did you do something to hurt him & you got in a fight because of THAT? in that case, i would send him an email [not on instant messenger - he can easily say "gotta go, bye" and leave you] asking why you guys aren't friends anymore. if he doesn't respond, i would just not try to make contact with him, but not IGNORE him either.
your goal isn't to forget about him & not be his friend anymore. your TRUE goal, if i'm not mistaken, is to figure out why you guys stopped being friends & if the relationship can be repaired. if he's mean to you now, then don't bother with him. but if he still says "hi" sometimes, it might build back up.
look into it. if you want something, you have to figure out WHAT exactly you want before you can go after it. have you decided you don't want to be his friend anymore & want to forget about him? [ then your goal is : forget about him ] do you want to figure out why he doesn't talk to you anymore? [ goal : figure out why he won't talk to me anymore ]. that's the first step. then, you can take steps to reach your goal.
take it slow. don't bombard him with emails. know how to display self control. one email. if he doesn't respond, fine. drop it. for all you know, he could be really upset about losing you too.
just be open to anything that happens. don't ever flat out tell someone that they're not your friend anymore because one day, you may just need them.
good luck, sweetie.
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To completely cut him off from your life wont help to start with.
You need to really limit how often you see each other to begin with, make it less and less gradually, then decide whether the friednship is improving or not.
If its not improving then cut contact, if it is improving then keep it at a steady lever ofseeing each other not very often, and gradually build it back up. :)
Good Luck <3Marizzle.x
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