|
how can i tell him this?
Today my boyfriend and I were making out, and he put his hand up the back of my shirt. He has done that many times before and its fine. Nothing else happens. But today he kind of made his way to the front and tried to get up to my chest. I didn't say anything. I just kind of subtly put my arm in his way and he stopped. He didn't try again and I never told him to stop so I can't blame him, but I got really upset. I actually started crying which was weird because I don't cry much at all, but I tried to hold it back, and I told him it was just my contacts bothering me. He kept asking what was wrong but I couldn't tell him. I could only say "I don't know". I can't get myself to say the words. I want to wait a while and I know he cares about me, I'm sure he would be willing to wait till I'm ready for that. But I don't know how to tell him. He's shy about things like this when you actually talk to him about them so I think telling him face to face might be really difficult.
HOW do I tell him? When can I bring it up? How do I put it into words? What do I say to him exactly?
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
well make sure you tell him soon so that things dont get ou tof control. trust me no boy will make a big deal about it. for the most part if your not ready then your not. just kinda of cassually slip the conversation in thier by saying i need to talk to you he will say what and you can say well you know the other day...... and so on hope i helped
]
I like you. You're a good kid. This question made me happy that there are still people like you left in the world, but that's aside the point.
The best thing to do is just come out and say it. Start off like "Babe, we need to talk." That way he'll know it's something serious. Then just lay down the fact that you're not comfortable with going that far. If you are really quite nervous about talking face to face, write it in a letter. A text or IM makes it a lot less serious, which is not what you want to do with a subject like this.
]
Okay, if you don't tell your boyfriend that you don't like that, he might feel like he's in control or he may feel he can do something bigger. Just tell him the truth. Explain to him how you feel. Relationships are based on honesty. Say something like "I feel really weird when you touch me there." Just be totally honest.
♥ Mz.JENNiFER
]
The best way is to just TELL him and be direct about it. Until you do tell him he won't know and this same problem will just come up each time until he starts to think he's doing something wrong. And the thing is even though he is doing something wrong (something you don't want to do) you're also partially responsible because you're not telling him.
If you can't tell him it to his face tell him over the phone or online or in a text message or something. Either way, find the best way you can tell him and just let him know what's going on. I have to say though I find it weird that this guy is your boyfriend, you've made out with him but you can't tell him this face to face because he will get shy about it. :/ The way I see it, if he can do the deed he should be able to talk to his girlfriend about it too so if you can do talk to him face to face about it. The thing is, and I only thing long term here, you can't keep on having to tiptoe around him when it comes to things like this just because he's shy to talk about it face to face. It doesn't work that way and you'll find it will just complicate things more as time goes on. I mean this was just a small issue but imagine when things get further along the relationship or if it's something really important - you both need to be able to sit down and talk about it face to face because you can't talk about everything in a text or on AIM. Sit with him, cuddle up if you want as it may make you and him feel more relaxed and comfortable and then start by bringing up that day and how he was asking you what's wrong and you said you didn't know. Then just say you think you might know what it is but don't leave him hanging - the last thing you want to do is make him think your breaking up with him or something. From there just tell him what you wrote above or, if you really want to, write it down in a letter to him and show it to him while your there. Either way, let him know and talk bout it. Showing him it and then just not saying anything about it will not solve anything. Make sure he understands you're not ready and that everything between you both is okay. Trust me once you've gotten it off your chest you'll feel a lot better about it and realise it wasn't really half as hard as you thought it might be. :]
Good luck.
]
More Questions: |