|
Cant get worse than this
This is really long, But Im desprette So please listen.
So one night I had my two friends Sleepover danielle and Carly. Things were going great until i brought up my Crush Me and Jenna went to the same school and Danielle went to a different one. I showed Danielle pictures of him and everything. I never actually talked to my crush ( James ) but i Knew carly was really good friends with him so I asked her to introduce us online. So things were going amazing we were talking and really getting along. Then Danielle says she is going to talk to him on my other computer when we are all ready to go to bed she tells me she is in love with him. And i start getting pretty mad.
So days go on and She starts really getting To Know james, They are constantly texting and On the phone with eachother while i am trying to get closer to James.
So the other day i was like Danielle, We are both in love with James so lets just make a promise not to tell him how we feel or anything, Lets all just be best friends and nothing more and we will never tell him how we feel.
So then Like a day after that Danielle Goes and tells him she likes him. And he says he wants to get to know her first so i get pretty mad.
But today, I am talking to Carly when she goes I gg James and Danielle are coming over. And i was like so pissed off because Carly was nice all through my tough time she knew how much i LOVED James and how mean Danielle was acting and Yet she does this to me. I try talking to her about it but she got so mad at me She was like I would have you over too but i forgot and I got upset So the more Upset i got the More mad she got. ANd then she sends this to Danielle adn Danielle is flipping out on me and they are all ganging up on me.
I cant help it i m gettin so jelouse and i told them Now James is gonna get to know Danielle and He is gonna like her. And I am so upset I have been crying over this all day.
I just really need help. Sry its so long
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
Well, first off, your friends sound like backstabbers, and I don't think if I were you I'd really call them your friends. Because, I mean, there tottaly like excluding you, and ganging up on you and everything, and that just isn't nice.
But, Danielle has every right to like James. Hes not yours, so, if she wanted to tell him she liked him, then she can. All is fair in love and war.
I understand that sucks, that they tottaly went against you, and therre lame friends, but its just a boy. so you kinda have to make a decison, whats more important, this kid you hardly know, or your friends?
]
Before you jump to the conclusion that your friends are being evil, mean, people, consider a few things. First of all, your friends knew that you liked James before you even talked to him, before you even knew him, and before (most important of all) he knew you. Although it's not tactful to go after a guy your friend likes, he's still fair game. If Danielle genuinely likes James then she has a right to do that, I mean, you can't help liking someone. If both of you end up falling for the same guy for you to claim that only you can be the one who ends up with him is unfair to Danielle, even if you did realize you liked him first.
Now consider that while you are completely upset over the fact that James is going to like Danielle, also consider that he turned her down. He doesn't like her! As much as you are upset over the fact that Danielle has this huge shot at getting James, she doesn't. She still knows him (even after spending the day with her) just about as well as you do.
Also think that maybe all of you could be overreacting. Both you and Danielle just met James and claim you are in love... you barely know the guy! One thing that really turns guys, and people off in general, is when others come on saying that they are in love and want to be together suddenly and out of the blue. In terms of how this affects you... why is James so important to you? Is it possible it matters more to you that you get James because your friend likes him? Is it possible that you are upset because of your friends ganging up on you more than anything?
Now for the whole point of this website: my advice. First of all stop crying. It's not worth it. Take a chunk of time to focus on what makes you happy... this being something that doesn't have to do with a boy. Honestly? You're so much better than this. If it's truly him you're crying about he doesn't deserve your tears.
Second. Though you don't necessarily have to apologize, don't overreact to your friends. Yes, they really should have handled the situation better than defiantly going after a guy that you did say you liked just previously, but at this point overreacting can and will make the situation worse. The more you act like you are cool with the idea of James coming over and even with Danielle liking him (you don't have to actually be cool with it but support her feelings, even if you don't agree with them... you're in the same situation, right?), the more Carly will introduce him to you. Remember, also, that your friends are the most important thing. You have your friends, you don't have the guy. Overreacting could cause you to damage relationships with both. If it helps, just don't talk about James to Danielle at all, tell her not to bring it up, and focus on other reasons why you two are friends. Do something girl related, like go to the mall or whatever, just don't let a guy come between you.
On getting James. You don't need your friends to get to know him. Talk to him casually online and maybe suggest a casual meeting. Don't go up to him and say "I LOVE YOUUUUU!!" because that will scare him away. You in fact have more of a chance than Danielle, in some ways, because around her he will be on his guard.
more advice: stop crying! this will pass, I promise. Just try to stay cool. Tell your friends why them leaving you out upsets you, but I have a feeling that more fighting/getting upset over James will do more harm than good at this point.
]
i say if shes really doing this to you shes not being a true friend because if she was a true friend she would respect how you feel and that you liked him EVEN before he ever talked to her. i think its terrible that they are ganging up on you like that you have to tell them how you feel calmly. dont yell or flip out try to get them to understand...yeah youre annoyed at the fact that you really like this guy, but you cant lose your friends and if danielle keeps acting like that...i dont know i hate to say it but shes not being a true friend thats what i mean.
]
Thats pretty harsh. Your friend just cut your grass like that and then your other supposed friend knows this but still supports this even though its wrong. There are unwritten rules about friendship and that is to not steal the guy your friend is in love with or has a crush on. There are so many guys out there, why did she have to take your guy? Thats what you call a scandolous b!tch and ufortunately a lot of girls can be like that ( two faced when it comes to guys) that is why you have to be careful with who your friends are because true friends wouldn't do that to you. Ive been through those times too, where someone you thought you could trust as your friend, backstabs you just to get with your guy. The truth is they're not your friend ( a girl in the past who I thought was my bestfriend fell in love with my boyfriend and then locked me out of the room when he was super drunk and didnt know what was going on and she F#Ckd him well, I should say raped :P) Neadless to say I quickly ditched her as my friend knowing that i could never trust her again and I also got rid of the boyfriend of course - no question about it, Now I have awesome girls who have my back no matter what and the best boyfriend) Anywho, you need to find friends who got your back no matter what and believe me they do exist. Dont waste your time being hurt by the ones who are supposed to be close to you. It can be very hard when skanks like that act as if they're your friend and do that to you, its not easy to deal with but you dont need them anyway. And for them to be mad and gang up on you? They're hurting and deperate. They're scandolous and normal girls like us hate those type of b!tches. SO, don't cry anymore and focus your attention on finding better friends, ones that you can trust and wont turn their back on you the moment a guy walks in. True girlfriends stick together and If your interested or going out with a guy, rules are, friends shouldn't even mess with him or flirt or talk to him if they had your best intentions at heart and if they don't, that's how you know theyre not your real friends. Theyre not following the rules of a good friend and in the end theyre not going to have any friends because their poor judgement will have betrayed everyone. Dont worry, their will be more James's out there, even better ones and all though it hurts, you'll find an even better guy in no time. Anyway, he probablly wont even like her after he gets to know her because hell realize that her personality sucks and shes nothing but a whore. SO, feel better and wipe those tears away because you dont need people like that in your life.
]
More Questions: |