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idkk what to do...
14/f
yeah, well i have a boyfriend now... but now when i talked to this one guy.. that used to lik` me.. and he waited for me because he wanted to, but i told him not to... but he said to wait for me anyways is mad now. he says that i lied to him and made him wait and lead him on when he was away from town... but i didnt.. well at least i didnt think so. but when i went out w/ the guy i am now i was goin` to tell him to not to wait for me, lik` i did last time, but then the day after he got mad saying that he shouldnt have fell for me and etc. i dont know what to do.. but i was pretty sure i didnt tell him to wait for me. he asked me out before but then i said that i felt a vibe and all.. but i didnt really like him. >.< help me please.. i want us to stay friends.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
If you know that you didn't tell him to wait for you, don't try to convince him. You know you're right and he's only saying that out of anger. Just talk to him and tell him that you want to be friends for now and if he doesn't want that, there's nothing you can do about it.
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Okay... let me get this straight. Guy #1 liked you, and wanted to 'wait for you' for whatever reason. Then you started dating Guy #2, and now Guy #1 is jealous and says you lied and led him on. Right? Alrighty.
Basically, you don't seem like a complete idiot, and if you don't think you were leading this guy on [intentionally or not], then you probably weren't. Guys tend to think that anything that makes them like you more [even if it's a freakin' hairstyle or something] leads them on. So if you say you didn't do anything like that, then I don't think you did.
That being said, you need to talk to the guy that says you lied. Tell him straight up, "Look. I really do want to be your friend, but I don't have romantic feelings for you. I can't date someone I don't like that way, and even though you're a great guy, I just don't feel that way for you. I hope you understand that I'm not trying to hurt your feelings, but I want to make it perfectly clear that I don't like you. If you think I lied to you, I'm sorry, and if you think I led you on, I'm sorry, but I never meant to." Then go from there. If he wants to be your friend, great. If he can't accept you as a friend, then I think you need to drop him like a hot potato because he obviously doesn't want you to be happy.
As far as Guy #2 goes -- your boyfriend. You should explain the entire situation to him as well, just so that he's in the know and whatnot. If you make it clear to him as well that you don't like the other guy, then everything should be fine and dandy.
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Hi honey,
Well, all I can say is be ready to deal with stuff like this for the rest of your life. Hopefully not too often though. Some guys think just cause you say Hi to them, that means you like them. In their minds they play out all these fantasy's about how much you like them and what a great time you are going to have together. You can run across a guy like this at any time in your life. Please be careful. Sometimes these types of guys can be very possessive. I agree with you, that you were clear when you told him not to wait for you. Here is another fact. You cannot remain friends with guys like this. They think every time you are just being nice or polite, that it means you think they are special. I think you have to be very clear to him that you are not interested. Stear clear of him, avoid him as much as possible, and don't encourage him, even by being nice. You can be polite though, and hope for the best. Hope this helps.
Michele
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