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Love Bites The Dust
I am 16 years old and I just got this new boyfriend. He is super nice and a really talented musician. I dont find him physically attractive at all actually. But his personality, humour, and talent make up for it. I like him, I really do. But I feel really akward being around him when it is just the two of us. I am trying to cope with it but it doesnt seem to be working. I dont want to break up with him because people are telling me that he really likes me. They tell me that me going out with him is the best thing ever for him because he is sobering up. He used to be into drugs and alcohol and smoking but now that he is going out with me...he has stopped doing all of that. I like how much he has changed but I still feel akward being with him. I dont want to break up with him! Is there anything else I can do? If so then please help me. I would really appriciate it. Thx in advance.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Things are awkward because you probably rushed into the relationship and barely know each other. If you aren't happy in this relationship, don't lie to yourself or the guy. It will just make things worse. Break up with him, but insist you remain friends (maybe with benefits if things get better between you two?).
This awkardness can be fixed by being friends first. You need to get to know each other and have fun. Go bowling. To the movies. Putt putt golfing. Go out for ice cream. Go swimming. Just have fun together. After you do that, it will be a lot easier to be alone with him.
Once you have done all that, THEN you can decide if you want a relationship with him. Trust me, you'll feel better by doing so.
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Hmmm... it sounds as though you really "like" this guy, but that maybe you aren't really attracted to him. Of course, there's a lot more to relationships than physical attraction, but that is a pretty important part. Maybe you're feeling awkward because you still don't know him that well, and once you get more comfortable being alone with him, things will get better. So maybe you just need to give it some more time. But if time goes on and you just aren't "feeling it", then it's probably best for both of you if you break up. It's wonderful that you have had such a positive influence on him, but you shouldn't base a relationship on being someone's saviour. It is his responsibility to keep his act clean, and you shouldn't feel guilty or responsible for what he does if you break up.
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Being untruthful to him is the worse thing you can do. Help him by helping yourself. Break up with him.
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Breaking up with him is the right thing to do. It isn't fair for you to stay in the relationship if you aren't truly happy. Talk with him and explain how you feel and maybe you two could be good friends afterward and you can help him stay on the right track. Hope this helps and remember it takes time to heal so if he needs a little time after you two talk try to understand.
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If you don't really like him then breaking up with him is the only thing you can do. Staying in a relationship with someone, just because you think they need you isn't fair to you. Explain to him why you want to break up, but tell him you can still be friends and that you'll still be there for him and support him.
::Jasmine::
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