|
Parents hate my boyfriend.
I'm a 14/f. And I have a WONDERFUL boyfriend. Yeah, say I'm to young to be inlove, I don't care.
Anyways, i'm white, and my boy friend is mixed(black&white), well..my parents are exactly rascists..but they are really bad to stereotype and they think all blacks are bad and they think they all steal..and kill people. lol. Well, they think that about my Bf. And none of it's true. And it's not his fault what his color is. And really, if you were blind and he never told you that he had black in him, you'd never know.
He doesn't try to act all 'gangstuh' and 'ghetto'...he actually leans more to the emo/scene. Haha.
But, still, my parents dislike him, and i've let him meet my mother twice. and still...she hates him. is there anything i can do to convince them different?
I mean, i have to deal with it at school, too. getting called a nigga lover..and everything else. I know i can't do anything about the kids at school, but i would like to change my parent's view on the situation.
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
This is one of those times when you can tell your parents to fuck off, in a respecting manner of course or else they'll ground you.
Ignore what they say about your boyfriend. If he's a good person, then he's a good person. DOn't let your parents tell you otherwise.
As for the kids in your school, you can tell them to fuck off in the most disrespecting manner possible, or just ignore them. Those kids are fucktards, don't let what they say get to you.
]
Im 14/m and im going to tell you to stick up yo your parents, tell them to go to hell, cause you no your boyfriend. I woudlnt care if they thought my G.F was a gangbanger that is there oppion and there aloud to have one, but tell them to keep it to themselves. GOOD LUCK!;)
]
That has to be soo0o frustrating! I know how you feel because my parents dont like my bf either..not because of racial issues or stereotypes..but because of his poor choices in the past. It frustrates me so0o much because now he turned everything around..is out of trouble, has a job, goes to schoool all the time, and a lot of other good stufff..but they still dont like him. (and we have been together pretty much over a year) It hurts a lot..and we fight a lot over it..but i have come to this conclusion :
All that matters is that I am happy and he is good to me. I cant make my parents like him no matter what i do..so i hope in time they will come around...but until then i am not going to let it ruin my life or my relationship. There is nothing you can do about your parents bad stereotypes on him..dont frustrate yourself any longer..the only thing i can advise for you to do..is to tell your parents exactly how you feel. Tell them how he is a great guy..but obviously they arent going to stop hating on him..so tell them that is their choice if they choose to shut him out of their life. They might feel bad and realize they are wrong. Good luck..i hope your parents arent as stubborn as mine.
]
Let them get to know him & to let him come around more. If he's nice & respectful towards them, they might soften a bit. If he treats you well, that could also do it. You need to talk to your parents about it. I doubt they seen this coming & they're not sur how to handle it. Talk it out with them calmly, and you may go places. If you get an attitude & whatnot, then nothing is going to change & it may actually worsen the situation.
As for the kids at school, fuck them. They're dumb & need to grow up.
]
The only way people change is by having an open mind to things. It seems obvious from what you said you're parents either don't or just plain don't want to change their opinions on your bf. The only real way you could try and show he is not like that is for them to meet and obviously get to know your parents better (and vice-versa). It may open their eyes as to what he's like but I have to admit that most just won't change in which case you may just have to deal with it. I suppose the good thing though is that they have not forced you to stop seeing him which is a good thing. I had this same problem with one of my ex's (I'm Sikh aka asian and she was white) but her parents were very against the whole idea and it got to the point that it because very difficult for the relationship to continue because of the amount of stress it put on the relationship. You'd think they would at least be greatful when I was there for her and helped her to deal with her drug addiction but that's gratitude for you. :]
As for the kids at your school - that's called ignorance. Personally I think education is wasted on people like that since they take all this stuff in but still learn nothing. :/ Ignore it as best you can because it's pretty much all you can do but don't let it get to you or let you stoop to their level. If it's any comfort then know that once they get into the real world they WILL learn from their mistakes (I could go into an example from what happen to me but I'll resist the temptation to write it here for everyone to read, lol).
As long as this guy treats you right then it's all good. With your parents, just give them time to try and get to know him better. Eventually they'll either change their views on him and see not everyone is the same or they won't.
Good luck. :]
]
More Questions: |