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Bisexual or Hung Up?
I think I may be Bi, but I'm not sure. I asked a question on here earlier, about the guy, "Jon", that I knew on Myspace, that turned out to be a girl, who looks and acts like a guy. (She is Bi.)
Until I met her, I had never really had much feelings for girls. But now I've realized, I loved "Jon" when I thought he was a guy. Why shouldn't I love "Jon" now, even if she is a girl?
I'm 16, and I'm just trying to figure out what I want. Sometimes I think that I only liked "Jon" when I though he was a boy. Now, everything is different, now that I know that "Jon" is really a girl. I don't know how to feel. If I like her, I get this sickening feeling like I'm this "disgusting" and "wrong" person if I like her.
But then sometimes I think that I'm just hung up on "Jon," and I'm having a hard time accepting the fact that Jon was never a boy. Also, all of my friends are saying they are Bisexual, so why shouldn't I as well? I feel like I'm missing out on something.
Should I just take a chance and say that I'm Bi? (even when I don't really know if I am or not.) Should I tell "Jon" how I feel about her? I feel so wrong just thinking about being Bi...
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You are Hung Up.
You might be bi, but you don't know yet. Which mean you really shouldn't go around announcing it to the world. You have a lot of time. You’re only 17. You don't need to figure out your sexuality tomorrow.
Having a same-sex crush is WAY different from being bi-sexual. Even having a few girl-girl encounters, in my opinion anyways, doesn't make you a bi-sexual, A bi-sexual is someone who can have a loving, sexual relationship with a member of either sex.
My experience is this: Most people will have a same sex crush at some point in their lives. It's not that that crush isn't intense and the feelings powerful, just that it doesn't really go anywhere and it doesn't happen again. Your encounter with this 'Jon' has some strong markers of the kind of relationship that doesn't go anywhere: One, she started it off with a lie. Two, you are unsure of your feelings. Three, it exists only in cyberspace.
I hope you can be objective enough to see that those facts make a happy and healthy relationship with this person very unlikely.
So wait it out. See if it happens again. Take a step back from this online encounter and pay attention to what you experience in your real, everyday life. I wouldn't recommend you discuss your confusion with Jon. She is obviously biased in this, and would like you to be bisexual. But this is something you should figure out without any pressure from her. She might not want to pressure you, but if she is interested in you, she will, even if she doesn't mean too.
Don't take a chance on you sex life or your sexual identity. Go into each sexual encounter with your eyes wide open. Know yourself, know your partner, and know what your intentions and desires are as well you can. Anything else will only lead to more confusion and pain.
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First of all, if all of your friends are saying they're bi because everyone else is doing it, then they're stupid, dumb, ignorant & fake. They're not really bi. If you say it or "turn it" because your friends are, then you're just as fake & ignorant as them.
There is nothing wrong with being bi. You're not disgusting. You're not wrong, and there is nothing wrong with you. I'm bi. Whether people seem to accept it or not, I don't care. I do what I want, and I am who I am. There is no changing for anyone else.
If you're not sure if you're bi, then you're bi-curious, or you're questioning your sexuality. If you want Jon to know how you feel about her, tell her. But don't say you're bi because everyone is saying they are. Say you're bi if you're positive that you are.
Finding yourself & coming to terms with your sexuality may take months, even years to find out. And that's okay.
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well first of all, do you actually know "jon" like in person? because people act different in person than they do on myspace. so like you might not like her once you actually meet her. you should try hanging out with her a little and then if you still like her tell her how you feel.
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