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My best friend is just ditching me! What the heck?
ok, me and my used to be best friend were best friends for 2 years lets call her jess. I know that's not terribly long but it was for me because i never really had a BEST friend like her. She was like a sister to me. Anyway, i started being friends with this girl, lets call her Jill. Ok, anyway, me and jill would talk everyonce in a while, but then we started being better friends and she would sit with us at lunch.I was still very much friends with Jess. Anyway about a week later, i got a boyfriend. I was hanging out with him sometimes, Jill sometimes and then Jess sometimes. Jess has/had a lot of friends, and i've always had to deal with her hanging out with other people i'm not completely fond of, which was ok, i didn't really care that much. Through the whole thing i really tried hard to keep jess from feeling left out, but there still wasn't as much attention on her as normal. Then, she just stops talking to me alltogether. For about three days, then she talks to me and says do you still want to be friends? Like im feeling left out and stuff. and i told her that i really want to be friends with her, i'm just getting other friends too. So that was ok, and she started talking to me again, but still not as much as normal. Then one of her good friends went on a feild trip for this special class she takes. That day, we were like we used to be, best friends. Then, her friend gets back and she totally ignores me again. So, i tell her when we get off the bus that we need to talk and that i would call her. So i call her that night and say "i really need to know what is going on. it seems like you dont want to be friends with me anymore" she just says i dont know, then says she has to go. So, i get on messenger that night and finally just ask her friend what the heck is goin on. She is like, well she doesn't want to be friends anymore. Well five minutes later Jess gets on and i say, Why couldn't you just tell me? she is like idk. and then she says this girl kelsey is telling her all this stuff that me and Jill are doing on weekends and stuff (which i found out later she was lying) So like this whole week she's been totally ignoring me and i've just been hanging out with other people, but she pretty much took our whole little possy/clique thing withher, and sits there and talks crap about me with them all the time. I'm wondering if i should talk to her anymore (i tried to talk to her but i just got yelled at for asking her friend what was goin on) and try to work it out, or just find new friends and move on. I'm sooo mad at her and it seems like she is just a heartless coward.
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If she was your friend, she wouldn't be your friend when it was on good timing for her. She would always talk to you and always hang out. She would be a good friend. But she's not. Instead she gets mad when your focus isn't constantly on her & she stops talking to you altogether because she feels left out. On her part though, she talked to you about it. Most girls don't do that. They just completely stop being your friend with no reason given.
Keep hanging out with who you want to, and stop being friends with Jess. She's fake, and she's shallow. No good for friendships. You've got a boyfriend & new friends, you've got what you need.
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If someone who is supposed to be your friend would act like this towards you and ignore you or even lie to you, then they weren't really a friend. She should be more understanding about you makng new friends and she should have been happy about the fact that you still tried to hang out with her and not have her feel left out, you still included her in your plans, just not as much as you used to. But it's better than nothing. You were understanding so she should be too. And if she would lie to you about the reason on why she doesn't want to be friends anymore, that's just pathetic, you shouldn't have to deal with people like that. I think you should just go on with your life, don't try to talk to her because that's going to give her more to say about you. If she doens't like you then she shouldn't even waste any time even talking about you. Just don't talk to her, she might even eventually go up to you and approach you and appologize. Don't just completely forget about her, but don't stress yourself out over her.
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She's not a friend. Friends don't treat friends that way.
You were a convenience when she didn't have anything else going on and wanted you exclusively thinking you didn't and couldn't have other friends.
Now that you've proved you have friends and a life too, she is jealous that she doesn't have you undivided attention-- more like devoted attention.
Ditch her and move on. You've made new friends and friends that understand you can have more than one friend.
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